/ Stories / Humorous
Good day, dear reader. Scored on the funny, I would say black humor, the stories of Alexei Ilyin. Humor is very specific, with a few very nasty words, not for people with a thin, vulnerable body of mind.
Spelling of some words: author, did not correct.
1. Hedgehog milk.
In the morning on the way to school, I got my foot in the shit. Some fucking creatures shit right on the sidewalk. Having stepped aside, I, swearing, began carefully rubbing my sneaker on the withered grass leaving on it ...
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Spelling of some words: author, did not correct.
1. Hedgehog milk.
In the morning on the way to school, I got my foot in the shit. Some fucking creatures shit right on the sidewalk. Having stepped aside, I, swearing, began carefully rubbing my sneaker on the withered grass leaving on it ...
Read more →
Any woman is always an actress. This, in my opinion, Alla Pugacheva said. I would add that every woman, at least in part, and somewhere in the depths of the soul, is also a prostitute. After all, every second at least once in her life went to bed and spread her legs, pursuing some self-serving interest. And the other half are either unable to benefit from their charms because of their poor quality, or they charge an exorbitant price and gradually fade away in the hopeless expectation of a suitable client. Those few ...
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Ksenia Valerievna was a spy by vocation and training. It was introduced as a super egg in the womb of the wife of the famous professor Kolchak, promising in the future promotion of the career ladder for him and his wife. In the womb, Ksenia Valerievna fed through the umbilical cord with environmentally friendly products, delivered by morning planes from Geneva and Schubert's music, recommended by her mother’s doctors, in afternoon nap.
Sucking in her alpine vitamins, she learned to be fast and penetrating, like the sound of wind ...
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Sucking in her alpine vitamins, she learned to be fast and penetrating, like the sound of wind ...
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Angelica was waiting for Alex in a cafe. She took the menu, opened it, closed it and hurriedly threw it on the wooden table, turned her head to the window and looked thoughtfully at the passersby. A leg in a gold sandal with a thin high heel lived its own life, swaying nervously on the second.
- Easy, girl. You just thought.
Alex called and invited her to dinner. In the old cafe near his work. Where the waiters went silently, and only flashed shadows betrayed their presence. But who looks at the shadows ...
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- Easy, girl. You just thought.
Alex called and invited her to dinner. In the old cafe near his work. Where the waiters went silently, and only flashed shadows betrayed their presence. But who looks at the shadows ...
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Timothy Collins made his way to the concert hall through the crowd, thick as a jungle. Damn these impresarios: why not schedule concerts for the weekend? On weekdays, Chicago is like an anthill, if you shove a shovel at it. Six in the evening, and he slipped all his shoes ...
- The devil! - He cursed when another heel collapsed on his foot. - What are you, boy ... - and stopped short when he saw that the culprit had suffered himself.
An old woman with glasses was screwed into the crowd, pushing left and right, and from e ...
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- The devil! - He cursed when another heel collapsed on his foot. - What are you, boy ... - and stopped short when he saw that the culprit had suffered himself.
An old woman with glasses was screwed into the crowd, pushing left and right, and from e ...
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I decided to put on a light and playful text again, so be prepared. This story does not pretend to any credibility, there is not a drop of truth or logical meaning. All as you like!
Enjoy reading.
Record 1 (start a new diary, the last drowned in the swamp, along with boots)
Already the fourth day I hunt for this damned dragon. The fourth day under the constant expectation of death or murder. Dratoran is a dragon who has not yet seen the light Royal Golden Lizard. I...
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Enjoy reading.
Record 1 (start a new diary, the last drowned in the swamp, along with boots)
Already the fourth day I hunt for this damned dragon. The fourth day under the constant expectation of death or murder. Dratoran is a dragon who has not yet seen the light Royal Golden Lizard. I...
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28.07.
7.00 Bath.
- quick quick! - I screamed. - Krutysh wake up immediately I tell you.
Waking up from a dream, crazy sage looked at me with crazy eyes.
- Well, what are you looking at? Call on the cell ambulance. You do not see Krutysh ass broke.
- So it was true? I did not dream it. - ...
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7.00 Bath.
- quick quick! - I screamed. - Krutysh wake up immediately I tell you.
Waking up from a dream, crazy sage looked at me with crazy eyes.
- Well, what are you looking at? Call on the cell ambulance. You do not see Krutysh ass broke.
- So it was true? I did not dream it. - ...
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Irena Samsonovna, the wife of Kondraty Matveyevich Tsetselitsa, a large and significant man, in many ways shared the views of her life partner. They have lived together for more than thirty years, and during all this time she has never regretted that she married him. In my old years, Irena ...
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Less than a year, as once, in the evening returning from a computer club, at home I found my mother having dinner with the director of them holding him. I almost immediately recognized him, as I saw pictures from the corporate party where they danced, and he frankly held her buttocks, I greeted him politely, and went to my room. After that, I watched him several times at home. I was already in the subject that he did not go to drink tea to us, several times I came home "at the wrong time" and they were still doing it, and so to ...
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On a flat sixty-inch screen, a passionate Hispanic handsome man caressed a moaning blonde with a huge bust. The girl's cute face glowed with pleasure. A close-up camera took plump pink sponges when the next one flashed from the speakers:
- Oh, yes. More! More! Fuck me! Fuck me faster!
The sweaty bodies of an athletically built man and a beautiful girl for an hour and a half continued to give out the well-known popular product - porn.
- An abomination, - with a touch of envy, summarize ...
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- Oh, yes. More! More! Fuck me! Fuck me faster!
The sweaty bodies of an athletically built man and a beautiful girl for an hour and a half continued to give out the well-known popular product - porn.
- An abomination, - with a touch of envy, summarize ...
Read more →