- Kilometer two.

- Thank. Goodbye, - Shurik slightly jerked the bridle, then pulled with all his strength again and again, but the donkey did not move. The girl laughed loudly, watching the desperate attempts of Shurik to move the donkey.

“You see, there is no step without you,” Shurik stated dejectedly, secretly rejoicing at the ass's stubbornness.

The girl looked thoughtfully from the donkey to Shurik and back.

“Okay, let's go,” she finally decided.

The girl went to the city, the donkey followed her. Shurik was an interesting conversationalist. All the way, he entertained a girl named Nina. The path to the city flew by. In good spirits, they parted. Nina hurried to her aunt, and Shurik wandered into the hotel, reproaching herself for being ashamed to ask for the address of the beautiful companion.

Chapter 2. Compensation

A thick-haired man with a big fleshy nose waddled his way home down a quiet street. His name was Jabrail. Despite the sunny day, his face was darker than clouds. He had just gone for twenty sheep and the Rozenlev refrigerator. He sold his niece Nina to a prominent fiancé. But not his conscience tormented him. Jabrail was worried that he recklessly promised the groom to find performers for the kidnapping of his niece. And people outsiders from another area. Jabrail did not know where to look for them. Strangers appeared rarely in the local wilderness. Sighing, he noticed on the wall of an inconspicuous house next to the open door a hand-written announcement “DANCE SCHOOL. PAYMENT FOR TAX. TAXA: 1 RUB. Just below hung another ad “SESSION OF SIMULTANEOUS GAME. PAYMENT FOR TAX. TAXA: 1 RUB.

Jabrail stopped and read both announcements with a thoughtful look. Suddenly his face lit up with a happy grin. He came up with something.

At the open door at a small table is located infantile-looking middle-aged man, who played the role of the ticket collector. To the sound of music, he counted the rubles received by the dachshund in the twist rhythm. Glancing back, he casually threw a few bills into his crumpled hat, putting it on his head.

At that time, on a tall stage, a bald man with a big beer belly was teaching the local youth to dance a classic twist.

- This is not a lezginka for you, but a twist! Show all over again. With the toe of the right leg it is as if pushing a butt ... Pressing the second butt with the toe of the left leg ... Now push both butts together. Demonstrate ... One, two! One, two!

The fat man surprisingly deftly rotated with two legs, crushing cigarette butts and moving his hands. His students repeated these simple movements after him. A few minutes later, the young boys and girls danced a twist on their own, and he, sitting down on a chair, imposingly watched them, smoking a cigarette.

Not far from the improvised dance floor, a slender man with the face of an avid alcoholic gave a simul. He walked sedately and intently along one side of the counter. On the other side of the counter sat aksakals, wise with life. The grandmaster easily won one game after another. And only in front of a spiteful old man, he thought for a while, and then resolutely made a move.

- A fish! - Grandmaster said triumphantly.

From the game "goat" he was distracted by a shrill car horn. He turned around. In the best times of the red gig already sat two of his friends. Grandmaster hurried to them. Their trinity, well known in places not so remote. Among the local contingent they were known by their nicknames: Balbies, Trus and Experienced. The grandmaster who gave up the best years of his life playing dominoes was called Balbes. His infantile-looking friend was called the Coward, and the bald man with a big beer belly - Experienced.

Next to the red car stood a satisfied Jabrail and smiled broadly.He found suitable performers for his dangerous operation, with completely strangers and non-locals. Jabrail immediately reported this to the customer, who kept his word and gave the due reward.

A few hours later, cheerfully singing a fashionable tune, Balbes drove twenty dissatisfied bleating sheep into the courtyard of Jabrail. Behavior walked slowly behind them, dragging the Finnish white Rosenlev fridge on his mighty back. A coward fussed around him, giving valuable indications of the type: “Right”, “Left”, “Forward”, “Don't Kantuy!”.

All sweaty from the heat, but happy Jabrail closed the gate. From the window of the house looked out his anxious wife, Sayda. Suddenly the riches fell completely away from her. While Balbes shoved the disgruntled rams into a stall, Experienced carried the refrigerator into the house, cursing through teeth on the annoying Coward. Pollock disappeared in the bowels of the building, meeting Experienced with a refrigerator.

In addition to the award, the buyer gave Jabrail the keys to his country residence, which was called the Eagle's Nest. Having handed over the keys to Byvaliy, Dzhabrail released the trio of intimate friends.

Georgian night came unnoticed. The heat was replaced by coolness. In the night sky the stars glittered like diamonds. The moon, coming out from behind the clouds, illuminated the earth with cold light. There was no barking of dogs, no donkey shout, and only in the distance sang a bird plaintively, evoking sadness.

Lounging on a bench, Jabrail pondered. His niece Nina was sold and paid for. It only remained to deliver it to the buyer. He developed a cunning plan to abduct Nina. He entrusted his realization to the trinity he hired, led by Byvaly. And when they set off to prepare for the operation, his niece unexpectedly returned home. If he knew about it in advance, then he could give Nina to the customer today. Jabrail frowned in annoyance.

Suddenly he noticed how Sayda looked out of the house and secretly went to the gate. He quickly jumped up and firmly blocked her path. Pollock, not expecting to see her husband, was frightened, her beautiful face turned pale. She lowered her head in embarrassment.

- Where are you going?

- Sold ?! - Said emotionally exclaimed.

- It's my business! - Djabrail brazenly answered.

- Nothing will come of it! - Sayda said with conviction. - To steal such a girl ...

“... athlete, Komsomol member,” Jabrail continued mockingly and imperiously finished. - Go home!

Pollock knew the cool temper of her husband very well. She had no choice but to go home and go to bed. Jabrail returned to his thoughts, which his wife interrupted. Today was a good day for him. True, he expected to get twenty-five sheep. Jabrail grimaced again. Suddenly his face brightened, it dawned. Once he did not receive five sheep, then he was entitled to compensation. From this thought, Jabrail became agitated and even began to sweat. There was a slight grin on his face. When he sold wine, he always tried it, Djabrail reassured himself.

The man resolutely headed home. In fact, he had long ago decided everything, having poured Nina and Sayda into a sleeping pill. Sitting on the bench, Jabrail waited for it to work. His niece with appetite was eating dishes prepared by his wife, and had to sleep.

Unlike her Saidu, being in a bad mood, she practically ate nothing. Dzhabrail well knew his wife. Attempt to escape Pollock did not come as a surprise to him.

Softly opening the outer door, Jabrail tiptoed to the room in which the unsuspecting niece was sleeping peacefully. The floorboards treacherously squeaked. He carefully opened the door and looked into the room. Nina lay on her back, arms spread wide over a thin blanket. With a dreamy smile on her lips, she was fast asleep. In the next room behind the wall, his wife was rhythmically snoring. Jabrail sneaked into her niece's room and approached her bed.

He was worried about the question: Is Nina a virgin? Unlike Moscow, in the Caucasus, ancient customs were honored.The girl, getting married, must be a virgin. Otherwise, it was a great shame not only for the girl, but for her entire family.

Jabrail pulled the edge of the blanket. It slid to the floor. ... Read more →