fuck you

Stirlitz told how it all happened,

Having hung up all the noodles,

And that witness is dystrophic,

Confirmed that he was there.

- That's because the bitch-bad luck!

All otmazalsya again! -

Muller crucified in anger,

What am I going to catch him with?

11***

After these misadventures,

Stirlitz is clearly not in himself,

- To nerves are not naughty,

I need to repent.

There is one old friend,

Two hundred grams - and on the horns,

Begins to sing, burobit,

Nice small - pastor Schlag!

That's Stirlitz at the gate -

Boots on him pussy:

- Open soon! -

Screaming.

Pastor Schlag is some kind of gloomy,

- Ile is not happy about me, my friend?

You're a metanis for schnapps,

Shcha you Deutsche Dam.

Pastor frisky methanus,

Schnapps brought and snack,

And they already sat down,

Right behind the altar.

- Well, tell me, father,

What is not fun as always?

What happened to you?

What grief, trouble?

- Yes, that's what a mountain

Stuck with me, -

You play me more: -

My son confesses:

I lived myself quietly, peacefully,

Sometimes with you booze,

Only the demon lured me -

I got into trouble.

No grief before

I didn't have a dick

But in the pharmacy to validol,

I bought Viagra.

And for some reason, all the pills

Immediately with a fool pizdanul,

And since, seeing a woman,

I felled the fence with a dick!

Well, women - parishioners,

All to confession to me

And then the blood inside plays

Dick is already no urine.

Here, I thought and hurt:

There is a "Cahors", there is clophelin

And today those pills

We zapizdim vino!

There was a holiday here,

Full temple, fuck-dig!

And moreover, only women - the "Cahors"

I started to take communion.

And then I turned around -

Fuck everyone cross over,

And the nearest frau, on the move,

Straight on the eggs planted!

The first fever was driven away

I looked around, and then,

This fucking team

Together lined crustaceans.

So along the way,

Each I put in Hell,

Everyone is blacked out - and they don't smell

What I fuck them now!

I laid out all in height,

Again, each planted,

Dick stands like a concrete pillar,

My ardor has not faded away yet!

What is in height - I'm in weight

Started after their fuck,

Like a sewing machine,

Managing to insert dick!

Went so the whole parish -

Who in the ass who in the mouth!

How came to, do not remember

What was there - all nichtyak!

Only there was a provocateur,

And broke me, asshole!

While dick parishioner,

I baptized,

He, hiding behind the chiot,

I scribbled denunciation!

Stukanul, Gandon, in the Gestapo

Parishioner, they say, fuck

And now mandrazh batters -

Group sex, bitches, sew!

Fifteen years will be exactly

On the "master" to plow,

Over the hill, would I go,

What would zone not stomp:

- Listen, Stirlitz, you are friends,

Help me fuck me!

- Yes-a: You asked, father, the heat:

Exactly - the truth is in wine!

- What to do? I have a dick

You flew into shit,

Okay, come on, do not ssy compote -

There is a “window” on the border!

And they are already in the car

Famously rush to the pass,

Braked on top -

Stirlitz ski here got.

- Come on, pastor, put on,

Then you will move yourself!

- Look, there is not even snow!

How can I understand this?

- So what? And what the fuck do?

Did you watch the movie? Did you see how

Did you fuck there on skis?

Put on quickly, crank!

All questions - to the director,

If there is - the market with her!

And I for you to overclock,

Turpentine in the ass ladies!

- Well, bend down, aha: so better

Here is an enema - fuck!

With God, Father! And arrow

You quickly rush to the border!

 — — ---------------------

On the border, where the barrier,

CAT and guard,

Screech terrible suddenly hearing

Nervously pulls his head off.

- There may be an avalanche of stones,

Is it flying over there from above?

No dick in the dust is not visible:

Skier?!!! What kind of nonsense ?!

Well, I managed to understand, my dear,

How it all happened

How is it, the barrier, booth,

That bullshit on the cliff blew:

 — — ------------------------

Stirlitz, looking down from the top,

He shook his head only

- Visible for the first time on skis:

And went home.

12***

Already approaching the house,

Caught the movement of the curtains

- What the hell is this?

Seen in the house got a thief!

He took out his "parabellum"

The door quietly opened,

With a cry: - Halt !!! Lie down all bitches!

He fired at close range.

And the emphasis as pizdanulsya

Right under his feet,

Stirlitz is scratching his own turnip -

- I don’t understand anything:

They made up, bastards,

Anecdotes about me: -

There's a note sticking in the closet -

Too strange garbage:

And crept quietly to the closet

He clutched at her:

And how pulled with all the dope:

Here as someone will bark!

And straight from the cabinet

Stirlitz with a firm hand

Borman took out the squeak:

- Well, finally: Who are you ?!

Borman himself can not understand

How did he get in this closet,

- I remembered! - Someone is also in the joke,

He told me about it:

- All right, everything, disappear, nit:

Let me be alone:

Yeah: fun tonight:

Here is the snaps pizdanu:

And then he opened the window,

- Who is on the street? -

Damn - thought Stirlitz

- Stirlitz - they thought:

Well, then, a little later,

Entering the dark bedroom

Stirlitz stepped on the pebbles: -

Pebbles screamed like a pig!

Everything: kaput: got glitches

It should be seen to drink less:

It will be necessary tomorrow morning

I go to the professor:

13***

That professor is a strange fellow,

Respects cocaine

How doznyak nose zahuyarit -

I do not understand where he looks.

Pleyshner - was called our razeseba,

In medicine, not chopped,

But like all around, for a bribe,

He opened the first-aid post for himself.

And now he has a clever mug

Patients accepted

Here to this I raze,

Stirlitz on reception hit.

- So glitches, speak?

Glitches - it's fucking:

How in the morning "chernyashki" insert -

So sit, all day be dragged:

What would you have done in this: -

You much swallow schnapps,

So I, as I understand it,

Should I give you a sick leave?

Well hospital is not a problem

I draw though straight schA:

- Stirlitz, there is one concern,

Mostly with me.

Bash bash as they say

I am sick, you give me a “plan”

"Breaking" something fucked,

Have you agreed? Deal?

- Well, professor, you give:

"Plan" to get it - you can garbage,

Only there is one snag -

I have a “point” in Bern:

"Plan" - nichtyak! I answer,

So catchy - ooh!

But for the "plan" you have to

Fly to Switzerland.

- For the "cant" in the fire and in the water,

I will go to the end of the world!

- Well, professor, get ready,

I'm waiting for you on the street.

That's up to the plane

...  Read more →