“Well, Nastena, your hour has come,” said the lad sadly, shrugging her shoulders.

“Why it is me,” the Elfmain was indignant, “let Nataha die with him one day.”

- Sorry! Friend. I am a married lady. What horse is it from?

- How do you feel about gay families? - Looking at the terrible monster, then at Kostya, who was speechless from such blasphemy, Nastya asked.

- No! - Said three-meter. - I have a normal orientation.

“Now I don’t have to be the queen of elves,” the princess said, wiping involuntarily tears, involuntarily rushing to meet her fate.

Having come up with the now not terrible, but opposing creation, Nastya said:

- Well, let's get started.

- Let me kiss you, my constricted! - He announced the monster and, bending down to the Elfma's sweet-chubby, tried to imprint on it the corresponding seal.

Bad breath, touching the lips of the chosen one, instantly changed to riglis spermint. Choosing the best, the horror turned into a good fellow - a bold man. Beautiful and stately, able to argue with many Hollywood movie heroes. However, Nastino did not last long. He began to grow old by leaps and bounds. The birds were singing, they instantly smoked. He began to bloom again the flower Scarlet, withered and withered. Scattered in the dust of centuries.

After 15 seconds it was all over. The ashes of an instantly aged young man were immediately dispelled by a strong wind that had risen. The flowers withered, the trees were gone, the trickle was dry. And only impetuous crying, left alone by one Princess, watered and read out the neighborhood. It must be admitted that she wept not with grief, but with the joy that everything ended so quickly. The desert was also over, and the snow and ice of the Edge of Eternal Winter could be seen nearby.

- My girls! - Kostya declared pathetically, - we will face serious tests. Cold and hunger. Wind and blizzard will stand in our way. But before entering the kingdom of Darkness and Cold, I suggest making love, here and now! There we are unlikely to succeed. Not everyone wants to freeze the ass in the piercing wind.

- I agree, - confessed Nastya.

“I support,” Natasha made a statement.

They loved each other, ardently and passionately, wickedly and chastely. And only silent sand, chuckling to himself, thought: “Kama is resting in the morning”. Finally, the broken love act, moved into a snowy-icy distance.

What awaits my heroes there? Do you think the Snow Queen? Who knows, who knows ... I know exactly what awaits them, but this is in the next chapter ...

- Have you ever had a desire to build a beautiful finished figure from ice puzzles? - with doubt, examining the trinity, the blue-faced woman announced.

“You got the roof out of the cold,” the youth decided to do evil. First of all, speak Russian: “mosaics,” not “puzzles.” Secondly, we are interested in something else.

- What? - raising amazingly plucked eyebrows, asked the Snow Queen.

“To eat,” Kostya clarified the situation.

- And sleep, - added Nastya.

- Voila! - issued a magical order of the Queen.

In front of friends, an icy table appeared, filled with frozen dishes. With Baskin Robins, carelessly neighbors ice cream, factory "Red October", Eskimo, grinned its chocolate. Corn sticks with corn, quick-frozen up to -40, side by side with Olivier. Well roasted horse meat, lamb and pork with beef, were ready to eat, but were beyond 0 degrees Celsius. A variety of drinks iced up so that they could not drink them - nibble yes!

The Snow Maiden, filling her mouth in turns, with horse meat, frozen oranges, and pineapple slices in her own ice, was crunching them with peach juice and papaya, was delighted, which is not true of Elf and Constantine.

Tens of kilometers left behind, which took on the role of a conductor to the ice kingdom, did not affect its icy impaction. Proudly pushing ahead, shaking from the cold of friends, Natasha Susanina, led the frozen travelers to the Kingdom of Cold.

“I’ll write you, bitch,” the future queen got angry, why are you an okhlamonka, do you think we’ll gnaw this ice? - Exposing to the side of Natasha, half-meter steel claws, pretentiously, Nastya expressed her thoughts.

- Do not be angry, Signorina Pomidorina, vitamins disappear from anger! Right now, correct! - Snow Maiden laughed.

By the beat of her white hair, she brought the coffee to a boil, salads to 20 degrees Celsius, and meat dishes to fragrant soaring. The juices became cool, the table melted, exposing the wooden base and the friends, paying tribute to Bacchus, had a nice snack. Yawing frankly, they were taken by the hospitable hostess to ice chambers, converted, immediately by Natasha into fluffy and sweet beds. Squeezed on both sides, by the hot bodies of two young ladies, Kostya instantly fell into the realm of Morpheus. The morning, except for the sultry love, was presented with buns with fragrant Nescafe Classic.

Bidding farewell to the hospitable Queen, the trio plunged into the frosty cold of the icy road leading to the unknown.

- What are you thinking about? - Asked Nastya, with frenzy clapping her teeth from the cold.

- About the sheepskin coat, which he left in the hut, starting the journey.

- Here is an asshole! - the Elf was indignant, - I thought about impetuous sex with me!

“And about that too, but warm.” - Barely smiling blue lips from the cold. Gave his mistress a guy.

“Well, frostbitten, not yet numb,” spurned Natasha smiled, her outfit being the colors of the June sky panties and a bra.

The rest of the clothes were hoisted on a friend, whoa, one hell was frozen. She trotted like a rusty horseshoe in a piercing wind.

- Just a couple of hours and dumber, - knocking his teeth, like a sewing machine Singer in the rush of tailoring a wedding dress, Kostya prometetil for a girlfriend.

- Rejoice others! And exclaim: “Earth!”, Pointing to the strip of land turning black away, reassured by the frost, Snow Maiden.

Rejoicing, gathering the remnants of the forces, rushed to the heat and midday heat.

After a short period of time, the human foot set foot on the hot earth. Fully exposed, they rolled and lounged around without eating anything.

Having quenched hunger with a mushroom-like ugliness, and thirst with the juice of love, travelers on fairy tales, broke the long path with the help of the Elven claws in the impenetrable jungle.

- Where are we going? - asked the wise Kaa, who came to the meeting of the trio of people.

- Or maybe eat them? - Supposed Bagheera and Balu, who had echoed her.

“I think this is the right decision,” Akela added, picking his teeth, this time I will not miss.

“We ought to ask Mowgli how he relates to this,” said Tabaki.

“Mowgli is not up to this,” the tiger Sherkhan wheezed, “He is now with a new girlfriend, I am for meeting NG with a meat dinner, who is against?” Abstain?

“We are keeping the way to the head city,” Kostya explained, “demonstrating a mortar, a couple of charged Colts to the full, and a wide katana,“ We ​​came in peace, the road, the tatters!

“Well, it's just like that at once,” Bagheera asked Kasatkina’s voice, “ragged”, there’s no clothes for us! But I’ll bite you right now and then it will be known who the "ragged people" are!

- Heads weaning! - hoarse Sher Khan.

“I'll tear it like a tuzik warmer, flashing red eyes,” Akela added.

“Stinging,” Kaa hissed.

- And send you! - freezing the army until - 237, the Snow Maiden smiled.

Going to the end of the journey, friends carefully avoided the ice figures.Having put a pair of fingals, Mowgli, who was indignant, was outraged, for the desecrated honor of friends in a village near the village, the friends finally reached the sea-okhiyan .... Read more →