I love myself to my fingers,

And there is no reason to blame for age.

If the boys used to turn around

Now men are looking after me.

There is such a belief - if you did not have time to say to a close person, write it on paper, make a plane, set it on fire and launch it into the air. And that person will surely hear you.

“Do you know what confuses and annoys me? This is not connected with me, now it’s only about your well-being, health and balance in the soul and in life.

I will tell you whether you are angry or not, I will survive.

A year ago, more precisely, more than a year ago, when we met, I saw an absolutely calm, balanced, self-sufficient, strong man, which was exactly what attracted me. People don't change, that's right. But...

At some instant you hit the wheel like a squirrel. Moreover, they jumped into this wheel, driven themselves there consciously, but, alas, not everyone can get out of it. Construction, politics, work, mother, Shabbat, oh, yes, it seems that the wife (well, somewhere she is) ... And now you are spinning in it, but there is no escape.

But everything is simple. Stand in place. A year ago, you were planning your time quietly, it was enough for everything, because you could consciously stop, stand still, even for a moment, but you could. And now you can not, do not try, do not want.

For me and for you, time flows in different ways. I have little left, so I spend it wisely, I'm not in a hurry. And you have a lot of it in front of you, so you are driving, rather, rather. What is faster? What for? Everything will be at the right time, at the right hour, at the right moment. One has only to get up and think.

But you do not want. In a hurry, time flies faster, but less tedious, unfortunately. Job? She's not going anywhere. You do not have a Thursday on which the newspaper goes. I have it. But ... if I did not have time to withdraw the bands at 14.00, I will withdraw them in an hour, nothing will change. The newspaper will still be released on Thursday.

You did not have time to make the car at 20.00, make it at ten in the morning tomorrow. The world will not turn over. You push yourself into a corner, it’s not even a wheel.

I remember very well the time when I was spinning myself. A head around, and from a place nothing moves. Just once I stopped and said to myself - that's enough. Nowhere and for nothing I will not run. No, the problems themselves did not dare, but it became easier to solve them.

Stop, just to take a breath and think about how to live. Thoughts will come themselves, but God will help.

All one to one. The time has come, and the time has come. Our relationship further and further comes to a standstill. This must be stopped for the common good. You exempt from liability, superfluous for you, me from obligations that do not allow me to live on.

Summer is coming soon. Another, similar to the past, I will not survive. I want to live, today, now, this minute, and not sometime later in the future. I have it, but short. Therefore, spending it on a mythical wait is simply criminal. You didn’t have time for me in the winter, but what about summer.

And to live on, you have to part with the past. No matter how hard it was. In order for something to appear, you need to free up space.

You have no idea how grateful I am to you for being in my life and still will, hopefully. How paradoxical it sounds, dropping me to my knees, you firmly lifted me to my feet. I'm not talking about self-esteem. I have always had it overpriced. I am talking about something else, more valuable and important.

You are the first and only man in my life who has raised my self-esteem to the highest degree. Thanks to you, I saw myself different, more significant, weaker and defenseless, at the same time protected and strong in strong male hands. You have become the standard of man. Find the second such impossible. But now I know what to look for. Thanks to you, I gained confidence and saw the way to go.

No, this is not a topic. There I laid out completely, there is no further way. Next - only equal relations. But I will not take off your ring, do not even hope!

I loved you and I will love you. But to save these feelings, it's time to leave.Leave everything as it is, like an unspeakable song, an unfinished book, like a conversation interrupted in mid-sentence.

Only in this way can we remain friends. Only in this way can I support you in a difficult moment, if you want it. Well, for seven years, for sure, maybe, if God gives, more.

I will be glad if you want to talk, write me something or call, and maybe even want to see, I will fly on the first call. I will be glad to be of help to you in something, help if I can. But now I have to step aside. It will be better for both of us. The Cat remains in your hands, it is a part of me, take care of it and remember that it binds us stronger than the whole world.

Forgive me for everything.

Love, kiss, ya

Submissive and faithful, still yours, slave, toy, thing, but now free.

PS: I am writing all this by hand, the only way to convey the fullness of feelings, vitality, only handwritten text keeps the warmth of the soul, only he conveys the whole truth ...

PSS: I have a small request for you - speak to me, please, at least sometimes, at least occasionally, at least one or two words.

I am so grateful to you for these rare conversations. (eroticspace.info) When you call, my mood rises. No, wings grow behind your back. It becomes so easy and free. It’s like I'm starting to live again. All over again, from scratch.

Talk to me ... Though sometimes. ”

She turned from a piece of paper, written on both sides with small lines, a small airplane. Out on the balcony. A flick of a lighter, and the paper tail of the airplane reluctantly licked the flames. She held it in her hand while she allowed the fire to burn. And then, as in a cloudless childhood, I started it, burning, into the air. Ash crumbled through the air.

The morning began as usual with an alarm clock. The head was free from thoughts, and life began anew. Once again? No matter...

“The one you really need should not be consistent with your concepts. He will appear and destroy everything, and will be himself as he is. And you will love him like this. ” (Erich Maria Remarque).

D iana Tim Taris, 08. 05. 2014