I rarely take a taxi. And indeed as a passenger, and even more so in the back seat. From here the night city even seems to be somehow different. Perhaps, since you only see it from the side window, lanterns, the outlines of houses fly faster, and you do not have time to consider them, so it’s harder to know the familiar streets. The sense of space is lost, I do not even try to navigate our location. Nastya told me something. About her friends, about how recently she went to her parents who lived in another city. How unsuccessfully bought autumn boots and therefore walks in the old. And it was not interesting to me. I was not interested in her side, which all girls have and is initially hidden. All this everyday fuss, routine. She, with a hard stone, dulls the sharp blade of passion, he cannot cut it. I think it is impossible. On the other hand, this is normal. More precisely, naturally. After all, everyone understands this, and many psychologists have already recognized the problem of losing interest in things that can no longer surprise us. Or maybe this problem has no solution?

I tried to engage in dialogue. And why was it so hard for me? Maybe I was ashamed in front of myself for my nasty thoughts and fantasies. After all, the object of these fantasies was now right in front of me. Maybe I was ashamed in front of Nastya? It is a shame for your uncontrollable lust. After all, we both understood that for this week, I could be with her not the first, or even the second. But those two hours of today I loved her as if it was the first marriage night of lovers of the newlyweds to madness, my tongue and my lips did not leave a single place on her that they would not taste. I think that other men love her very differently.

- You go, I'll cry now and come. Maybe I’m still walking around here, my head is buzzing something - I said quietly, making a small sour grimace on the last word, as if I wanted to look more convincing.

Taxi already stood near the club. Through the closed car windows, the sound of people passing by the car, laughter and shouting of people who were crowding at the entrance, conversations of taxi drivers standing near their cars, leaked into the salon. I felt an unpleasant prickly bustle, which was perceived by me completely hostile. I was tired after work, after sex, I just wanted to sleep. And loud music in the smoky room with a persistent smell of alcoholic cocktails would just kill me.

“Well, well, just come faster,” she answered playfully and left. I got the money to count the taxi driver. Slightly hesitated.

- Can I go to Bratislava?

He turned to me, as if he wanted to make sure that it didn't sound through the speakers of his car. Apparently, he clearly expected me to leave, and he would go further. Then he pressed his lower lip tightly to his upper lip, expressing to her the silent “well, as you wish,” and the car nervously began to move, trying to break into the continuously flowing stream of taxi drivers who were circling.

For some reason, I can not feel the satisfaction of tonight. As if it was a slippery slug, it rolled out from under my fingers when I tried to feel it. Pleasure is present only during the process itself, and then ... prickly discomfort, shame, perhaps, even fatigue. And then, the feeling that something inside is not in place. And it prevents me from fully absorbing the aftertaste of today's sex. It was difficult to fall asleep, because the brain scrupulously scouted this fact. Tried to feel fresh memories. How to push foot balloon. In every next moment you think it will work out. And he continues to slip out from under his feet.And you understand that there is no point in this, but you can not stop. I do not remember what the last thought was before the dream completely swallowed me. I remember that every thought took on more and more bizarre forms as soon as the dream became a step closer to me. And I have not noticed his full offensive.

I woke up early. Early for Saturday. Usually, I set the alarm clock even on a day off, so I don’t accidentally sleep until noon. I do not like to sleep for a long time. Otherwise, then I do not have time to do anything. At the weekend, I sleep only a couple of hours longer than on a weekday. But this is enough to feel cheerful during the day. At least, against the backdrop of vivacity of the weekday. I woke up quickly. Without experiencing any sleepiness, I got out of bed and headed to the bathroom to flush my face.

After washing, I came to the kitchen and sat down on a chair. Sat down in thought. Today, I saw this dream again. Today was the fourth time. I did not attach importance to this dream when I saw it the second time. This has happened before. There is nothing strange that some things can dream twice. And even the third time I do not remember that I was particularly worried. But today was the fourth. The fourth time in less than two weeks. Although, for the first time this dream plunged me into a state of mild shock. In this dream, I did not feel myself, as I felt in an ordinary other dream. In this dream I was completely in control of myself and my body. I could raise my hand, bring it up to my face and look at it. Lower your eyes down and see your legs. My body was completely subordinate to my mind and my will. I walked and heard my steps, felt the surface on which I walk. And everything did not look like a vague, conditional, unnatural. As if it was not a dream. The moment it happened to me for the first time, I panicked, nervous. Where have I been? I was kidnapped? This was the first thing that came to mind. Now, I know that it was a dream, because after it I woke up in my bed. Therefore, when he dreamed for the second time, I immediately recognized this place and the living sensations and feelings did not cause me to panic.

It was a huge endless space. I stood on the dried, cracked earth, dark gray. This land ran away in all directions, to the infinite horizon. The sky, a monotonous pale yellow color, as if shone by itself. No sun hung on this heavenly sheet. A kilometer away was a huge building. At first, it seemed like a medieval castle. From my place where I stood, the front high wall was well distinguished, behind it, a thick massive tower grew, which gradually became thinner and ended with an obtuse flat end. But I could not look at the windows on it, there was no gate in the wall. When I looked at this bulky building, it seemed to me that some background was coming from it. Just like tinnitus. I could not understand exactly whether these sounds are heard in the air or just ring in my head. From this inside of me the state of alarm grew. In the first dream, I just ran away from him. Ran into the far infinity. I ran until I was exhausted. Well, eventually woke up. Then, I was already calmer. The second dream I just spent sitting in one place, waiting for the awakening. Almost like the third. Today, when I found myself in the same place for the fourth time, I got scared. All this no longer seemed a mere coincidence. Maybe this is some kind of mental disorder? When dream the same dream. In any case, this has not served as a reason for going to the doctor. But on the Internet, looking for something like this would be useful. In spite of my fear, today I insistently went to this building. I do not know how much time I was walking, but the path lasted longer than I thought. The building as if sailed from me, and I could not notice how this happens. Maybe, of course, it was some kind of optical illusion. Although, what kind of deception can we talk about if it was in a dream? In a dream, horses can fly, not to mention the distortion of distances. When I was approaching it, I discovered its true size.The front wall, which from a distance seemed to be five meters tall, was in fact no less than a twenty-story house. The high tower that she surrounded was completely hidden behind it. The wall seemed to be made of stone, ... Read more →