Chapter 4. Attempt not torture.

In order to realize his plans, Ivan offered Alexander the post of his deputy, transferred to his office and spent most of the time with him. But the desired goal is not reached. Sasha was very hardworking, and therefore this position was absolutely on his shoulder. But only, as before, he remained only a subordinate of Ivan.

Then Ivan invited him to a restaurant. He arranged everything so that the two of them stayed at work, and then said that he was hungry, so he offered to go somewhere to eat, they say, he treats. At dinner we drank a little, Ivan allowed to contact him at you and just by name. Sasha was very happy, because he thought that the boss was offering him a real friendship. He had long admired his boss, and such a proposal simply warmed his vanity.

But again, nothing has changed for Ivan. Sasha turned out to be a really perfect man who did not even understand the hints that Ivan made to him during the evening. He did not take a single compliment, did not understand that when Ivan put his arm around his shoulders, they were hugs with a hint. He simply thought that the chef was delivered from alcohol and he simply could not stand on his feet. Sasha called a taxi, put him in the car and asked the driver to take him home.

Ivan began to get angry. Still would! For how many days he had already fed himself on telling Alexander that he loved him, that he wanted to be not just a friend, but a beloved one, and he absolutely did not understand anything. Thinking that Sasha was probably ignoring him because of his marriage, Ivan decided to leave the family.

For the word it did not. One day, after another quarrel with Rita, he left home. I took an apartment in the apartment next to Alexander and began to wait for the right occasion. But he did not come. Sasha worked diligently, came to visit to entertain a friend, but apart from beer, intimate conversations and sympathy about problems in the family, he did not offer anything else to his boss. And he so wanted more!

It took Ivan a few days to ask Alexander about his preferences, learn more about his character, hoped that when they would see each other more often and know each other more, then maybe everything would be fine. But in vain - Sasha did not know about his feelings. And Ivan was convinced of this, because he had already managed to study a friend well. He turned out to be surprisingly honest and straightforward, and all Ivan’s hints that Sasha was very dear to him, that no one had understood him so far as he did, Alexander accepted with gratitude, thinking that a friend had the same things in mind - a sense of male friendship, and not something else.

From impotence, Ivan got drunk. When Sasha came, he only sympathized, they say, how bad it is for you without your wife. The next day, the same story repeated. Ivan lost his head. He could not decide to tell Sasha that he loved him, because he was afraid that he would just laugh at his feelings, that he would not be able to understand him, because he loves only women, and only men can be friends with men.

But during this time, Ivan realized that Sasha was very worried about him, because when Ivan got drunk, he always tried to be there and calm him down. Alexander sympathized with Ivan, entertained him, said that everything would work out. But from these words it only got worse.

Once Ivan got drunk right in the morning. He could no longer control himself. He didn’t really care that a business could suffer from the fact that he had been working for the second week, carelessly, it didn’t matter what others would think about him. He wanted only one thing - Sasha was there. And even if he doesn’t know about Ivan’s love, let him never even reciprocate, if only he was near him, just to be able to talk with him, see him, admire him.

Ivan did not go to work, turned off the phone, thought that Sasha would immediately rush to save him, but did not take into account what Sasha could not do. He was a faithful friend, was a true professional, because this time he did not run to him. Alexander dealt with all questions at work, and only then went to see if the trouble had happened to his boss. Later, Ivan realized his mistake. What else could a responsible deputy do? Only by providing a reliable rear to his boss, could he go snot wiping him. But that day the mind left Ivan. He only felt sorry for himself and was offended that Sasha was not there.

Having found a friend in poor condition, drunk and sick, Sasha was seriously scared. Never before had he seen Ivan in such a state, and indeed not a single person. Ivan was pale and could hardly speak.

- Ivan, what's wrong with you? - Sasha his chef.

“Ahhh, it's you, my friend!” - Ivan smiled drunkenly. - You still came! And here we were drinking, waiting for you. And you were not ... Where were you?

- Foo, Ivan, what did you drink?

- I do not know, something brought Petrovich ...

- What is Petrovich? - Sasha asked, but Ivan no longer answered. He either lost consciousness, or just fell asleep.

Sasha was even more scared. I started to beat him up, beat him in the face to bring him to his senses. Ivan began to react. It was good, but the fact that he got so drunk was a real disaster.

- Ivan, wake up! I'm calling an ambulance.

- Don't bother! - stunned Ivan.

- Do you understand that you are poisoned? Do you want to die?

Probably the slap in the face and the cry of Alexander helped a little, therefore he was able to assess the situation more or less normally.

- Do not need an ambulance! - repeated Ivan. - I will put myself in order.

It’s good that Petrovich, a plumber from their house, with whom Ivan drank, brought a drink shortly before the arrival of Alexander, and the moonshine had not yet been absorbed into the blood. Therefore, gastric lavage helped. Then Ivan took a cold shower, and after a while was in a more or less normal state, if you do not take into account that the head was buzzing from a hangover, and the soul was torn from despair.

- Did you eat something? - Sasha asked when he was convinced that nothing threatened his friend.

- I’m confusing ... - Ivan smiled, reminding that everything was already in the toilet.

- Let's go to the kitchen, I'm hungry too.

Sasha made coffee, made some sandwiches. For a while, they both ate silently, thinking each of their own.

It was hard for Ivan to drink all day, it was hard to regain human form for himself, but it was even harder to listen to Sasha's accusations.

- Well, come on, Ivan, tell me how you came to such a life that you began to drink all kinds of nastiness.

- Do not remind.

- Yes, I would not have reminded me if I had not been afraid that you would not repeat this. Good that I guessed to come to you. And what would happen if I did not come? You could die here alone.

- So what? I would die and my sufferings would stop, - Ivan lowered his head, because there was no strength to look at a friend. Sasha now scolds him, but does not understand that if he himself had not been so blind, Ivan would have not suffered for almost a month.

Sasha continued to express Ivan further, they say, hundreds of people depend on him, because if he does not take care of his business, then those people will suffer. Then he told me that he had a wife and children, at least he thought about them. Oh, this is his justice, honesty and responsibility! Yes, spit on Ivan all! I'm tired! But he did not say this to Sasha. I also could not admit that I got drunk because of him. And when Sasha began to insist on the answers, he said that it was all because of Rita that he saw her with another. In fact, he saw her with Oleg three days ago, but he had to explain his act.

And then something happened that Ivan himself did not expect from himself - he began to cry. He was gripped by a terrible longing from the fact that, probably, he would not be able to confess to Alexander in his feelings, and if he decided, then this is the only thing that Sasha cannot understand. After all, Ivan no longer doubted that his beloved real man would never accept such love.

Maybe for a long time Sasha would have read the moral of a friend if he had not seen his tears.Ivan really suffered a lot, because these two weeks that he left home, he often drank, and today got drunk because of his wife, or rather because she kicked him out of the house. Making this ...