- The last dance. Part 1
- The last dance. Part 2
- The last dance. Part 3
Page: 4 of 4
and expected something similar, but still confused. I would be glad to fully convey the initiative to him in the conversation, because now I had nothing to say.
- Perhaps you are right, Sonechka. But still you cannot deny the fact that if I were at least twenty years younger than now, you would not be so confused and confused after my words. - In his voice felt bitter notes of disappointment and sadness.
“You said yourself that I was not like others.” - I started from afar. - For me, everything is somewhat different than most. I was looking for everything, I was looking for something that I could call my own without pretense, but I could not find it at all. The year before last, in the theater, when I stood on the landing and watched you go, for the first time in my life, I bitterly regretted losing someone. And the last two evenings dispelled the last doubts in my soul. I feel good with you, in your society I feel myself. In other words, I feel that we are very close to each other. And everything else is not important to me.
A pause between us made my nerves tense. Finally, he approached me with a heavy tread, and put his big palm on my shoulder. Exhaling noisily, he spoke in a low voice.
- I knew that I was still awaited by the amazing feeling that people used to call out love. I lived in anticipation of this, and here it happened to me.
I raised my hand and covered his fingers with my palm. Words were not needed. No matter what I said now, everything was insignificant in comparison with the rapid flow of emotions swirling inside. Everything that was happening was unusual and new for me; I could not clearly classify my feelings and sensations, so I preferred to just sit silently and tacitly agree with everything he could offer me.
Of course, in twenty two years I have met not one man, but none of them left a deep trace in my soul. Ironically, for the first time I felt the quivering excitement of my heart exactly when I least expected it, and Lev Semenovich, the sixty-year-old director of the museum where I was in training, became the culprit. Everything in me was in conflict: I knew perfectly well how strange this feeling seemed to others, but on the other hand, doesn’t it all matter to me if for the first time I can find true happiness? The voice of Leo pulled me out of these thoughts.
- Why are you silent, Sonya? Apparently, you regret what is said.
- I do not regret anything, no. - I shook my head. “I just don’t know what to say now.” I do not need words. I feel everything without them.
I wanted to destroy the invisible wall erected between us by age difference, fear and prejudice. At that moment I terribly wanted him to hug me, and I could feel like a protected little girl.
“I don’t need words, they’re just fussing,” he quoted Vvedensky’s line, and sat down beside me. - In a week your practice will end, you will take the train and go home. In a month, and maybe even earlier, you will forget about this evening and about those words that we said to each other. In such a beautiful girl, as you, undoubtedly, there will be a boyfriend, young and interesting. And then you forget about me. - He sadly summed up.
- I will not forget. - I knew that I will not forget. I would like to spit on everything and stay here, avoiding a long separation. But with her mind she understood that it was impossible. And then the idea came to me: - I will come every week, every time I can. Just eight hours to go!
He did not answer, only smiled, but for some reason his smile was sad.I even felt hurt that he doubted the seriousness of my intentions. I do not know what prompted me, but I suddenly turned and kissed him on the cheek. Everything stopped in me from excitement - it happened so spontaneously, unconsciously, and I was afraid that I made a mistake, spoiled everything with my incontinence, impulse. But maybe, by chance, I guessed his desire, anticipated expectations, because Leo pulled me closer to him with his big, strong hands, and kissed me back. His lips touched my forehead and then slid down my cheeks. And nothing needed to be said anymore ... Our lips, soon having met, all said without words.
Last week of practice flew inexorably fast and rapidly approaching the end. I almost did not do anything, only occasionally flashed before Anna Alexandrovna’s eyes, so that she would not forget about me. She treated me well and warned me in advance that she would give me "excellent" for going through practice. Finally, the fateful Saturday came. The last day in this city, the last day of such an unusual and strange communication with Leo. He accompanied me to the station. As I remember this moment - the train already approached the platform, and he stood opposite, holding my hands, and silently looked into my eyes. Silently, with a look, he begged me not to break his heart, full of hope and doubt. The conductor hurried me, and I reluctantly handed her a passport with a ticket. Rising to the side of the car, I turned and shouted:
- I'll be back!
He smiled and waved his hand.
- Come in the coupe. - Conductor said irritably and began to lift the bandwagon.
The train started moving. I was peeking at the dull-yellow window until the last moment, until his figure became tiny and did not dissolve into a hundred other similar figures on the platform.
He could no longer hear me, but I said once again, probably to myself:
- I'll be back!
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No return in yesterday, and do not enter the same river back. She will be different. Water will leak forever.
A painful history, even from the heights of past experience. Emilia, your every story is a story of the facets of life and love.
From me ten
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Thank you))) I am very glad that you liked it. This time you are the first - especially nice)
In fact, it is just as scary and really painful to do it, how exciting and sweetly-tempting to drink a feeling is. Especially when you have frustration, wounds. Already afraid to try again. The hero of this story was not easy to open feelings, but he knew what was going on. And for your choice is worthy of respect.
P. S. I hope you do not think this is the end of the story?))
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Even afraid for the characters. They are so real that I'm scared for them. If they do not stop now, it may be very painful for them later. Life is not music ...
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Perhaps you `re right. But perhaps they are lucky. And even if the music ends in a minor chord, the main thing is that it sounded at all. And could not sound. But we will know what will happen next only with the continuation of the story)) I hope you will not lose interest in it and read to the end)
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I did not read it, I did it a couple of sentences, but I think that the heroine is somehow ... offended. She would have sex and relax. Well, for hormones check if it doesn't help.
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Well, as I was afraid, they are already kissing. But this is my prejudice attitude, and it is not without jealousy. In general, of course good. And written and filed. You would really live a hundred years ago, or even two hundred. The more I read your stories, the more I recognize you, and I admire you. Such feminine and pure women are now long ago with no fire to find. I would have been 15 years younger too ... but I’m not as desperate and arrogant as this Leo Semyonych.
The continuation, in my opinion, will be the slow agony of this plot. I am sure this story will end sadly. And this is normal - no matter how much the old man wants to rejuvenate with love again, no matter how she feels comfortable with him, she must go on, on her way. And he should not be selfish and let her go. But you, as a romantic idealist, can present us with another option, less viable, but more naive.
See if I'm right. Waiting for the continuation.
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Thank you Rinat, for feminine and pure women))) Very nice, really) Only a hundred years ago I wouldn’t want to - remember, the revolution was brewing, and I would, if I could choose, I wouldn’t be on the Red side. So, most likely, my fate would be sad))) But two hundred is more interesting)))
I can argue with you - Lev Semenovich is not arrogant, the man simply revealed himself to his feeling. Is he to blame for being born forty years earlier than his lover? Everyone has the right to love, moreover, she responds to him in return. Is it bad? And the thing is not about age - and what, are peers always happy and living together to a great old age? Are there no divorces, gaps in people of the same age category? Sometimes it happens that people are looking for something else, and if they are lucky, they find it. This is exactly the case.
Regarding the continuation - you know, I finally stumped. I really do not know where to lead the plot. Remember, I mentioned that the story until a certain point is real? Not in terms of all circumstances, place and situation, but in the very development of relations. So, the moment came when the thread of reality broke. And I'm in doubt and creative agony - how to be? Most likely, since this is my creative work, and not a memoir, it will be as it should be, as it probably cannot be, but it could be.
I hope that you will wait for the continuation, and you will not throw your huge sneaker at me if you don’t like the plot))))
And about the age - it's you in vain)))) Very vain))
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Want to argue? And what about the hero and age? Well, I will try to explain to you. A man should be responsible. And not always he can afford to do what he wants. Imagine your hero loves a very young girl. But what can he give her? How much is given them - a year, two, ten? Is it a great happiness for a young woman to live with an old man who cannot do much already, either physically or morally. Old age, dear Emilia, is not fooled, and she has no right to deprive youth of opportunity. Now he is still fit for something, but how long is it enough? In the meantime, she could get a chance for a more productive relationship. So if he really loves her, he must, simply must leave this selfish idea to have her, and give her the right to a normal youth, for the future.
But all this does not mean that he is indifferent and does not dream of loving her.
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And yet, I do not agree !!! Well, there are couples where there is a big age difference, and these people are happy))) Suddenly this is the very case? And personally, my position is: it is better to be happy for ten years of your life than not to be happy at all !!!))) Suddenly Sonya, having refused Lev Semenovich, will not meet anyone else, will nobody suit her? Can you guarantee that she will be happy? No one knows))) You will not convince me))) Never and for nothing)))
But I agree, you need to think about everything carefully, and be responsible for the choice made. Both him and her)
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On the physical I will not argue)
And about the moral - I will object. Why is this morally elderly person not able to give her anything? How else can! He has a life experience, he knows a lot, he knows how to understand a person, he knows how to listen. Sometimes it is very necessary.
And the future ... Of course, it will be. But maybe thanks to such a relationship, a woman will be able to realize a lot. To gain. I do not know, maybe I'm wrong, but it seems to me, you can not run from love. At any age. Let one day, they let him, but together ...
And anyway, what if they are happy for a long time? Is it possible to know in advance? I would venture)
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Here is an example of the moral. Imagine that let's say the stars were perfect and my sweetheart told me yes. She is there in a little over 25, I half a century. She wants attention, recognition of her beauty, endless proof of her charming, leisure at last. And I worked all day, came home, and all I want is to rest in silence, lie down, sleep. I have neither the strength nor the desire to entertain her, although I am certainly glad of her presence in my life. But she will be bored, she is in the eternal standby mode of rare bursts of my activity, pieces of attention. I do not need anything, everything is seen, experienced, and she still has a lot like the first time.
In the end, she will be unhappy. And time passes, I'm not young. The realization that I don’t give up one who deserves everything and the best is not happy. So in this situation there is no right to this relationship. Only young people can live instantly, I feel sorry for her youth spent on me.
But again I repeat - all this does not deny the possibility of such love. Yes, Emilia? ;-)
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And what about Emilia right away?)))))))))))))
And still, not convinced. People are different, someone at thirty already needs to clean the mold, and someone at fifty is still very active and cheerful.
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Well, what are you stubborn. This is not about cheerfulness, but about internal resources and fatigue from everything, including life. When a person is tired of life, he will not be able to give, even if he wants. But you cannot understand it yet, my angel, and you are offended at what you need to thank.
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Here! Emilia said to the point - people are different. And there are young women, even young ones, who are very homely and quiet, they don’t need companies, they love the house and will willingly sit on the sofa next to their loved ones)
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Worthy sequel. About these unusual characters, perhaps, I do not remember the stories on ST.
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Thank)
Well, this is not surprising - after all, it is, in principle, and unformat on PT)) Well, let them))) It touches me, I wanted to write about it. And even here there were those who liked it. It was not for nothing that it expressed itself))
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Why write non-format, in a format that the format doesn’t really support, while knowing that the format of non-format is not formatted in a format whose format anfisa likes)))))))))) bling me, young and aspiring, who put an idol, a rotten, proud, nag and really discussing her verbose crap, which is abundantly flooded not only with reviews.
Wonderful story! I like this! I read it with pleasure, although the “not for here” text. Would put four.
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Why are you so offended me? I will never put an idol and never will. There is no person whose opinion would be more authoritative than the opinion of another. I may not be protesting, but I don’t agree either.
They said themselves - “not for here,” and I understand that perfectly. The story, or rather, the story is written long ago. Before entering this site. I decided to expose here, realizing that of course this is not quite the topic, but I wanted it so much and I put it out. And I liked it - I'm glad. Thank you. I am pleased, really. If, of course, this is a sincere opinion)
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What does sincere mean? I gave at least someone a reason to mingle in my words;) I do not often comment on it.
Why did you dramatically change the avatar? I have the legs of the past avatar like a dyu plya)
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I'm sorry, not aware of you, this is my first acquaintance with you. Therefore, I don’t know yet how sincere you are, but how much, how many, do you fan the pseudo-witty ridicule and sarcasm. Sorry if that))
Avatar is so coincidental. I wanted a new one.The previous one reflected my inner essence, this one is more external.
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Gushing.
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And this is my first time writing on this site. Therefore, most likely you are right in their distrust. Well, it's empty. I wanted to ask Cho - the new avatar is foggy and almost monochromatic, would you really paint the background with what colors, would it be necessary?
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Alas, incompetent. My job is to paint with words, paints for artists.
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Are you not an artist? Ay how wonderful. But the words, too, have a color. Here is a sony dress, I would mark a blue striped, no? :) you would have chosen exactly vertical for it, right? Or peas?
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Are you bored? ;-)
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Cho-that nifiga did not understand: is someone here so in love with Anfisa that he remembers remembering her at every opportunity?
I can and jealous ...
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What are you, how can you. But you must leave however today. Kiss the handle, but ёpta ... The leg of that avatar I can not forget perhaps a few more episodes.
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Emilia! Congratulations - the venerable Smol himself visited you and in two incarnations (Russian and Latin)))))))))))) And this means that the story was a success - Smol does not read anything bad. And about his avka listen: once he opened my eyes to Avu. Since then, I have the one that is now. Believe me, Smol and the taste is impeccable))))
And from me personally - a good story. Not a format? So what? I also write this way. And I will not write until I get tired of myself)))
And I'm waiting for prody from you. Thank!
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Thank you for your feedback))) And I wrote and will write as I want, how close)))) Actually, how else can there be creativity? Only unique, from the soul.
And, then, is it someone honorable? ... I just do not know)))
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We also do not know him)))) Although a lot of guesswork. But he has already become a favorite - sometimes trolls, sometimes praises or scolds, but always appears only among standing authors)
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What an intrigue ...)))) Forever people need to complicate things))
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10+++!!!
Very peculiar love story of a lovely flower to a lion. Throughout the story, I felt the feeling that something was missing. And at the very end I realized what. There is a lack of modern spirit. TV, mobile phones, yes cars, finally. The author describes with feeling the insides of the house and so forth, as if categorically denying the features of the modern era.
An inexperienced reader, having read only this part, can easily assume that the 19th century is described or earlier. the behavior of the characters of their conversations as if from a distant past. This is because Emilia imagines it like in the novel by Zola (as I wrote earlier)
Of course, Sonia and the gray-haired professor do not have a joint future, but love does not know the age and she doesn’t care about the condemnation of others. The story is not finished yet and I will wait for it all to turn out ...
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Ah, Yura, this is because Emilia not only imagines everything as in Zola's novels, but also would like it to be so in real life))) Finding one's happiness in another person, in harmonious coexistence with him, not paying attention to external world, disfigured and rapidly degraded.
Yes, probably, the heroes have little chance of success in the future, but I don’t want to let go of it “now” ... And how it will turn out, I don’t know myself))) As long as I want to stay in it, don’t rush to go forward, because I understand - there is nothing good there ... But, as part of the work, I’m certainly free to draw what I want))) Maybe I’ll do that, and maybe not)))
Thanks for the feedback)
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Make it your heart and soul. Reality is it so boring at times)))
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And do not say it ... Sometimes the eyes would not open, so as not to plunge into it)
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so make it beautiful)))
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I read the third part ... only.
Twofold feeling. Probably because it is not a girl)))
On the one hand, everything is all right, well, neatly, perfectly well, which he set. I understand the heroine and believe her, on the other hand there is a lack of some kind of internal "tornado-whirlwind" that would make a bestseller out of a hackneyed and not too innovative topic.
For me, for example, one question remains open. How does he live 20 years without sex? (after his second German wife left?) For me, this is something incomprehensible.
Then the second question. Material. The director of the museum could not have bought antiques at auctions on such a large scale. - Salary is not the same.
In general, Emilia, do not be offended. You write well, but some details are striking to me)))
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Why did you decide that he has been living without sex for twenty years?))) This was not mentioned at all, there was no reference to this fact. Divorced does not mean a monk. This is the private life of the hero, and it was not necessary to disclose it in the story)))
And about the auctions - in Soviet times doctors of science were well provided, and the family of the hero, although I did not describe this in the story, was always well-off. It’s probably indecent to ask “where the money is from”. So they were)))
I'm glad you read and left your opinion.
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Well, then if he is not a monk, then this is not the first and not his last intern))
And about the auctions ... In the USSR, as I recall, there were no auctions. Is that in the time of O. Bender ...
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By the way ... here's the topic for you 4 parts ...
He is just O. Bender at sixty-five.)))
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