Page: 10 of 10
something else - I do not remember ...
I woke up in the morning on the bench at her door. She probably didn't let me into the apartment ...
Well, then, so be it. I cleaned up the toilet in the cafe where I decided to have breakfast. And drove the worm back, kicking the door with boards. I know myself, but now I certainly have nowhere to retreat.
After breakfast, went to Rudolfovich ...
- How about next week? - he asked surprisingly calmly after my message.
- Next week? - from my confidence is not even a trace.
- Well, yes, why pull? Since you are so serious, yes, and Milan, as I understand it, do not mind ...
“Good,” I nodded and frowned. I do not like this his pliability. Something is wrong here...
- Tomorrow, right in the morning, transport your belongings. I will arrange to prepare the room. In the meantime, you can be free. Milana today classes until the evening. Let's start preparing for the wedding from tomorrow ...
Until darkness, I wandered through the park. It's strange - I thought that after talking with her father, my heart would feel better. Honestly, I expected him to go berserk, rush at me with fists and shouts: “How dare you, bastard?” It was his calm that finally broke the ground from under my feet. I do not like it. Maybe I do not care at all and go back home? Visit, finally, the grave of the mother - just nine days soon ...
No, better go to Ole. I will tell her everything, I will obey, I repent, maybe she will forgive me ... Or give some practical advice. No wonder she is so much older than me ...
I opened the door with my key. The apartment was quiet, the light did not burn anywhere, and I decided that she was already asleep. Trying not to make noise, I walked into the room. Olya really was already lying in bed - in the dim light of a night lamp I could discern her dark hair scattered on the pillow.
And then I heard a sound - a sob. And he noticed that her shoulders under the blanket were trembling. I sat down on the edge of the bed, hugged her and kissed her temple. She turned to me and, without saying a word, dug a kiss into my lips.
It was a farewell - we both understood it, although we did not exchange a word.
That is why I was so gentle with her, and she is so obedient and attentive. That is why, kissing, we closed our eyes, and our hands wandered through our bodies, trying to remember everything to the smallest details. That is why I tried to inhale as much of her smell as possible and feel as much of her taste as possible. And her movements and touches were so passionate and ... doomed? There was so much sadness in her that my heart sank and stinging in my nose.
This time we really loved each other, and not just fucked.
And then fell asleep, hugging tight ...
And in the morning I woke up ever more vigorous and resolute. I spent so much energy on making it possible that now there’s simply nowhere to retreat ... However, I already seemed to be talking about this ...
In the house of Milana I was waited as never before by a delicious and hearty breakfast — toasts, scrambled eggs, fresh juice and flavored coffee. And then we went shopping with Milana.
She chirped like a bird, laughed, made faces, occasionally tried to get into my pants, but I was cold. Of course, I really wanted to, but at the last moment something stopped me. Like some kind of shadow that passed between us and made me look at it with suspicion. But in actual fact suspicions turned out to be groundless — she laughed with silver, generously smiled and shot her eyes, and then secretly pressed her lips to my cheek. And I was melting. But then everything was repeated again.
In the evening, we returned home, and there already was a reception — some friends, acquaintances, partners, and contractors. The owner was cheerful and affable. Everyone congratulated us, clapped me on the shoulders, hugged Mila and clapped me on the shoulders again. He played a small orchestra, smelled of expensive wine and tobacco ...
But in this colorful crowd I was not alone. And not even because I was a stranger here - quite the contrary, it was easy for me to communicate with them.And that faty man over there, the owner of newspapers and steamers, was the owner of the cottage we were building with the men ...
“Well, you have a brigade,” he slapped me on the back, pushing me out of the crowd to the window. - More than a month has passed, and from you neither the ear nor the spirit. Well, at least for the money came - it would be clear, zabuhali. And so ...
“I ... is no longer in the brigade ...” I replied, licking my lips.
“Yes, I see,” he squeezed my shoulder hard. - Rudolfych would never have allowed his Mile to marry a migrant worker. Well, if suddenly you meet your men, tell them to come at least for a calculation - they are waiting for money, waiting ...
I nodded as he turned back to the table with the drinks, and turned away to the window.
The worm in my heart tried to break down the boarded up door, but I supported it with something heavy.
In the courtyard behind the patches of light from the high window I thought of human silhouettes. At first I decided it was a guard. But why would they stand there and stare at the windows? The silhouettes did not move. I froze too, but my heart suddenly began to beat, drowning out all the other sounds around. I recognized them! There he stands on the left, leaning slightly to the right - Zheka had scoliosis. And the one in the middle - a little lower in height - I recognize these eddies of Stepanych ... And the far right is the healthiest - exactly Kostyan ...
I recoiled from the window.
- Hello, Senya, how are you feeling?
My palms were cold and my temples were soaked. And what is he doing here?
“I told you that we will help you,” Roman Alexandrovich was holding a tall, narrow champagne glass in his left hand, stirring the sparkling liquid slightly.
“This is ... everything ...” I suddenly had difficulty breathing.
- Why not? - he scornfully snorted.
And suddenly the world around went in waves, mixed up into one mess of the guests' faces. And only Milana’s anxious voice could be heard somewhere far away, but he was also becoming weaker and weaker ...
“Hmm, dad, you were right, this is much more interesting than a banal dynamo,” Mila said with a laugh.
- Well, so ... - Rudolfovich answered with a contented smile.
- Boys, thank you. Your help was simply invaluable, - Mila’s voice became duller, as if she had turned away somewhere to the side.
“We were glad to help,” answered Kostyan.
- And I will visit Olya myself tomorrow. In the end, she is the most affected party here ...
- This has not yet come to himself? - I heard the voice of Roman Alexandrovich.
“Weak,” Rudolfovich snorted. - Because of some remorse of conscience lose consciousness.
The sharp smell of ammonia made me cough.
I sat up in bed:
- What for?
“Without this, it would be boring,” Mila smiled.
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10!!!
Well damn! I honestly wanted to strangle this non-commentator! I think - it’s necessary to write out such an image: a mean, petty young man. Scum and beast. And it was a game? !!! But the filth and cattle, he still remained. There is nothing sacred for him. Neither mother is friends. Move over the corpses to your goal. Fuck everything that moves and breathes.
The point is not even that everyone is alive and well, but that for him everything was real, absolutely real. It was not enough for him there at the entrance. You had to break your arms and legs and ... unscrew your head)))
No, really - I boil with indignation! Give birth to the mother of such bastards! And I would know in advance - I knocked my knees down.
I know that there was not all this. The story is an invention of pure water and only in the imagination of the author.
But here, led to believe. Believed in the veracity of this story. Do these happen? Subhuman? But what just is not in the sublunary World. There are also trenchant.
I boil, in short, from indignation!
No, I already let))))
Let me kiss you on both cheeks and scarlet lips! Respect, devil! Oh, respected !!!
Yes, I did not want to strangle you even virtually. And it would be necessary a little. A little, very little.
Nerve thruster, damn it!))))))
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Thank you, Yurochka)))))) I'm glad you liked it)))))))
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Well, just intrigue intrigue ...)
The story hooked, all the characters drawn. The lack of content at the end of the work is also perfectly written.
Thanks for the story. 10 points)
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Thank you, Sanya))))) That's just the product just scratched my vanity under the chin))))))))
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My dear. Look here in syudy: https://eroticspace.info/forum/threads/345/page-22
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I looked)))) I smiled)))) I was glad)))))) Thank you))))))))) After a hard day of work, it was I who did not have enough smiles))))))
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The story is very interesting. Although the volume, of course, is too big, I had to finish reading it at work. But the characters are disgusting - everything, even Olya. Therefore, I will refrain from evaluation. And maybe the mood I have is, and seeing the name I expected to read I do not know what, but something else. Written beautifully, but the feelings from reading ...
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Marinochka, thank you))))) For some reason, I again knew that you would not like it - maybe there was some kind of telepathic connection between us? Because your reactions, I guess at times)))))
Dont be upset ;)
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Wow! We read persuading each other to finish. By the middle of the story, the hero was already so disgusted that it was scary. However, some arguments, and most importantly the fact that the Non-commentator cannot be so bloody, never was, made to read it.
After all, even the “hints” left. And Mila's father is not a stupid man. He would have “calculated” the whole situation a long time ago. It's all too easy for a guy.
Then there was a “lack of meaning”, but still there would be a lump if it had not finally put everything into its place:
“- Weakman, - hemmed Rudolfovich. - Because of some remorse of conscience lose consciousness. "
All, (or almost all) of the heroes of the story - each other cost. Although, of course, this does not justify the GG.
Unconditional 10. Excellent piece. We want more)))))))
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It's nice when they consider me not to be bloodthirsty)))) It's nice that they believe that my bright and good will win dark and evil))))) It is especially nice that two people believe in this, who together, albeit apart;)
Therefore, I will not disappoint you and persuade me that I am bloodthirsty and greedy for all sorts of nastiness)))))
And yes, Rudolf like Seena sees right through, but this time he wanted to play. But who won from this is not for me to decide ...
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And none of us ... Therefore, we like it - as you write. And I want all the good things you talk about only in the “lining”, on the quietest level of your story, and louder than about the main characters, although the latter are more than audible (how can a whisper be louder than a cry, the mystery of your talent ), it was in this world.
We are ready for your stories, no matter how heavy they are.
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Thank you)))) So, I will continue to write))))
A whisper is louder than a scream - such a vivid image, even the picture has almost been born)))))))
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- I'm pregnant ... eight weeks term ...
This pearl needs to be taken out in the epigraph of all the subsequent most basic slag.
For reference: the weight of a child at this period is about 3 kg, the belly of a pregnant woman is like a huge balloon, at this period they sometimes give birth, and do not report pregnancy))
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Dmitry, do not build yourself as a clever man, this is not for you)))
8 weeks, this is only two months of pregnancy, the fetus is not visible, the abdomen is not. Read carefully and do not confuse the week with the months
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Pokhuist, admired by you, well, there are educated people, they know that in the month of 4 weeks)))
In general, really, oops, read "forty-eight weeks." True, this does not change my opinion about the quality of the story, for a negative assessment it is quite enough, for example, nonsense about a nurse who came to provide intimate services to GG in his father’s house, and the main character eagerly led, etc. P...
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Forty-eight weeks? O_O At this time, the elephants give birth))))) A baby cub matures in forty weeks;) But this is so, for reference;)
Well, now in essence - GG is a petty stupid creature, sincerely confident that the whole world revolves around his persona, and the fact that this may not be the case does not even occur to him))))) I, naturally, as always I exaggerate and exaggerate, but in fact, unfortunately, such copies are by no means listed in the Red Book ...
Sadness about this and I tried to fit into these ten pages. And, judging by the angry and enthusiastic comments, many share my sadness. But it already pleases;)
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Impressive !! But, no longer needed, I had enough.
Let's drink, reader, in a mug of shit:
The fingers are twisted, the heart is winter.
Live mannequins go by:
Their thoughts, like faces, are crooked,
Black souls and hands in the blood -
It is terrible here, terribly, even call your mother.
All these people are not people long ago
Bitter, dear, call us "To the bottom"!
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Zhenya, you shouldn't shed tears and call Gorky on my head - do not disturb the old man. We have already repeatedly argued about human nature. There are no good people, nor are there any bad ones, and I like this “hero” because he doesn’t lie to himself at all - yes, he puts his wardrobe in his conscience, but he admits that there is something to conscience from. Many very real people do not even bother with such a small ...
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Fu-uh, walked away, otmyak. Poets are often such nervous and receptive creatures.
I didn't answer too hard, didn't I overdo it?
But in essence, the story wanted to say the following: here, you so abruptly turned the story off with the main character and his subsequent insight. The rest was left for readers to think. And how does the author herself see the future of the protagonist, because you could not help thinking about it?
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I honestly do not see a future for him. I do not see the future for Milana either. Everything is covered in darkness. Because everything will depend only on them - they will learn from the events or not. But for some reason I think that they will not extract ...
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The story is gorgeous, intrigued and very unexpected outcome. Thanks for the extraordinary creativity!
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Thank))))
(> ^ _ ^ <my writing was called creativity! * left to jump through puddles for joy *)
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Great story
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Thank)))))
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Our answer to Hollywood.
Whenever I saw that there were already 10 pages in this story, I said to myself: No, such a feat is beyond your power, girl.
Only a personal acquaintance with the author made me show the will and start reading, and the respect for the early works forced me to finish reading “THIS MUTT” to the end.
I did not regret ...
Two, last paragraphs worth ten pages (prefaces)
The classic of American cinema David Andrew Leo Fincher with his psychological thriller “The Game” is spread over the wall. Here you may not be any Pindos suckers billionaires, here our goons from the provinces have fun to the fullest. What is there to dynamite newcomers in a nightclub. If “Twist the dynamo”, so on a large scale, with drifts, skirmishes, whirling, ty fights at the porches to a pulp and sending out invitations to the wedding.
In the scenery of the entire regional center, in the crowd of a hundred or two of the local beau monde. In the episodes only their own, (about forty people). If the daughter is in the lead role, then everything is an adult: Suck from the bottom of the heart, dear, that it would not be a shame for respected people to show the video from the booth at a festive feast in the sauna. Whores, say, suck well, and you see how my innocent daughter blowjob ..., begin to rock.
And if you beat in the doorway, then from the heart, that would be with fractures, rupture of the spleen, etc., and then they suspect something was wrong ...
Stanislavsky would have believed right away, I thought. At first, from reading, I smelled like Balabanovsky "Silence and Silence," it was all pretty painful, but I remembered my business trips to Orel, Voronezh, Kotlas. There, people really live like that. If you have money, then everything is on display, If the house is, then to a floor higher than that of the neighbor, if the neighbor's wife has a lover, then let me have: at least two of them will lead you, whore. If the protection of the daughter, then what would be like in the movies, go in a crowd in jackets and make scary faces. A daughter, a fool, that would not sit at home, and tusila in public and wasted money. What would you know, bitches, that dad has loot. "Well, we are here of course, not the capital, but from the heart ...".
In one regional center, the head of the local administration distributed posts to peasants, solely on the principle of the external attractiveness of their wives. He gathered all the leaders of his administration for meetings, such as the attendance is obligatory, asked everyone to turn off their cell phones. He left his deputy to hold a meeting, and with flowers and cake, he went to study the conditions of life of his subordinates. And the peasants sat and looked at each other: “... is the chief interesting today, my pyalit or yours?” Truth and decent wives, who sent a loving chief, came across. Here are just their husbands instantly flew out of work with a crash, some for bribes, some for embezzlement, some for misuse of funds.
Such is the natural selection, regional spill. So the manners are still there.
So against the rest of the characters, the main character did not seem to me so disgusting how everyone exposes him here. An ordinary, weak person in difficult circumstances of choice, between meanness and promising comfort, he consistently chooses comfort. In any case, he is consistent, at least in his meanness. And the fact that the price tag of a vile human life is, as my grandfather says: “After the first betrayal,
The second does not happen, this is the natural state of the scoundrel. “The boy tried to reach the goal in a way that was accessible to him. Why not... ?
In other words, when a girl without education, ancestry and means makes her way into a high society pussy * and meanness, it is normal - she is an ordinary bitch, and if the boy does the same, everyone will cling to her head and shout "Wah ..." . Actually, the idea is not new, we recall Stendhal:
“... to tell you honestly, I have to think that one of the ways to achieve success is for him to seduce a woman who enjoys the greatest influence in the house. “(Le Rouge et le Noir).
The boy used to live at the expense of women. At first it was a mother, then the first wife, and when the wife gave birth and it was necessary to do something around the house, work, raise a child, he rushed into the city, where he turned on his whole arsenal, joined the Olechka, having decided in one fell swoop their living, housing, and sexual problems. And as soon as a girl with a pedigree and from a wealthy family appeared on the horizon, the boy decided to use his chance for success in this life. Classics of the genre by T. Dreiser, “American tragedy” in the Central Russian style. It's nice that if his conscience does not torment him, then at least reminds himself of this worm.
However, for a little family, such razvodily, it is "Kindergarten in the country," they have such clever breakfast, smeared on the bottle. When it was necessary, they drove Milochkin's mother out of the house to die under the fence, and with this prostitute in pants and with x * em, they just decided to have fun like pussies with a mouse.
Nontrivial finals of pictures - one of David Fincher's favorite directing techniques, and our Non-Comentsch, so twisted the final, that you will begin to rock ...
Just that, it tells me that a person with such a set of data, like the main character, is unlikely to be found in a career, with a broken head.Cute and artistic scoundrels and opportunists, the product is single-piece, and for the regional center, it is completely unique. Especially the boy, it was so beautifully shown who is the player in this house and who is “Lough of Chile”. Most likely, the cynical boy will find work in the father's business, and there ...
Darling, she will have a gobble up a couple of times, and she will get tired of this “Dynamy” variant, and then the second double doesn't stick as well as the first one. You look, and remember about our boy. He sighs tired, thinks: What is he so dear to me? Oh yes, on the scale of meanness and cynicism - poured out daddy.
And, judging because, how sweet My darling sucked him, the girl's heart snapped at the boy. Pokolelesit, puppets, pumped plenty of clubs, and remember with nostalgia, our boy, especially in place, he had already been put, and fucked a girl, someone should. How much can the heiress of a large business dildo do ...
We will go to Naples, we will go to Baghdad! -
But my daughter said: - I want to go to Leningrad!
And what my daughter requires
Must be executed. Point...
S. Ya. Marshak "Mr. Twister"
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You know, dear Anfisa, you all so correctly noticed, even about the future (quite, by the way, probable) that I even wanted to sprinkle the second part. But on a sensible reason, I changed my mind - I would kill them. I hate to tolerate such “beauties” and “pretty girls”> _ <Freaks are somehow closer and clearer to me)))))
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Yes, one more thing. The main character turned out to be a close-minded person or something. Some kind of cognitive dissonance.))) It seems that there is a goal and reasoning is sensible, but the actions are stupid. Will make nonsense and thinks will carry or not. What, excuse me, idiot, will tell the first comer about his life, about his plans for life ... well, of course, they immediately went into position and let him help. What are sensitive thieves. Even if it was all ala play “The Game”, then it was time for him to think, and why is this the first comers meet him? In general, a lot of stupid things.)) And they do not beat people after losing consciousness, because they do not see how a person reacts, and therefore you can just kill. Here, like, they beat in the liver and neck, and tore the spleen.)) Apparently they beat me again.
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Well, I say - stupid smug bastard)))) I mean, GG, not you))))) I didn’t even guess to see another doctor, who would surely say to him that he has never had any rupture of the spleen, and the sharp pain is caused by an extensive hematoma ... But we won't tell him that, right? ;)
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Certainly not. Let him die in ignorance.))
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Thank you for writing your review, because I wanted to have it already, but your thoughts surprisingly coincided in mine, both in characters and in the “American tragedy”.
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Did anyone understand what it was? Feedback on a story or a novel in the recall? She responded to Hollywood, but she shut up in a belt for all of us in a crowd. Oh, I underestimated the size of the old Negro behind your shoulders ... But, nicho, we are still alive, we will wait for your first publication ...
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Anfisa T. This is, of course, a bad tone, in comments about the story they will discuss going beyond the limits of the story. But, here, it is painfully interesting.
You managed to rald the story to set out another story. And to him, too, there are questions that I would like to clarify.
“However, I remembered my business trips to Orel, Voronezh, Kotlas. There, people really live like this. ”
And within the Moscow Ring Road, they live differently. Something doubts take.
However, this topic will be left alone. It is closer to politics and to the arrogance of some persons, although it also runs like a red thread in all your narration.
“There is no second thing, this is already the natural state of the scoundrel. “The boy tried to reach the goal in a way that was accessible to him. Why not... ?".
With you, of course, it’s hard to disagree ... And yet ...Have you read the story to the end? Read carefully? Have you read the "justifying motives" of GG? Read his attitude to others? Have you tried to get to the point?
- “Nontrivial finals of pictures - one of David Fincher’s favorite directing techniques, and our Non-Comentsch, so twisted the finale, that you will rock”
And what, to apply at least partially, the already well-known “method” is it forbidden? Or should the author in each story come up with something completely unknown?
There is no new discovery of ideas, in what the author “repeated”, is everything all in a dump?
Bis.
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Perhaps, I confusedly expressed my thoughts, however, I did not want to offend anyone, neither the author, nor the readers, nor those who wrote comments.
If someone finds the strength to re-read my comment,
it is easy to see that the main idea is that Hollywood is smeared on the wall.
I, in turn, simply poured out on paper, the associations that I had as I read.
Separately, I want to note that the plot of the non-cometshi turned out not worse, but better than the Hollywood one. At the same time, notice that Hollywood screenwriters have millions of budgets and a crisis of the genre, there is nothing to watch, and then the girl on her knees scooped up the plot, the plot that the country's leading channels have to pull out with shouts and fights.
So the Russian land is rich in talents.
And Ro_Ii, of course you suck nicely and spectacularly, but I do it better,
so do not be angry, and let's agree so, you suck your own, and I mine ...)))
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Hollywood is smeared on the wall ... a girl on her knees easily plugs into the belt of American sharks ... hurry to see)))))
Thank you, it’s really flattering to me that you have such a high opinion of my cronyism))))
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As for “sucking” - in lichku, otherwise you will remind us of one of the stories of Kozyavin. We, with our double experience in the knowledge of human souls, have only smiled.
How smiled - you will see in your views yourself.
And here, about the fact that the story is unusual, and you recognized it - it pleases. I want to "pin up": "grow." But we are so clear that you are not a fool. Only, sometimes you play beyond the limits. We like it sometimes. Only, anyway, it is advisable not to go beyond too far.
We believe our modest conversation is over here. In a personal, or on the forum, we are ready to talk with you.
We are grateful for the high appreciation of the story, because we also liked the story with its versatility.
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It is better not to quarrel with you - you are anyway more than your opponent))))))
And yes, yes, more molasses for my ears, eyes and everything else))))) To make the next story a real slag, written in the language of a second year school composition)))))))))
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Do not be shy. Your stories on the forum, too, are not the compositions of the repetition year. So, we are waiting for your work.
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Are you a little? O_O)))))))))
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Sorry, Due to the structure of the structure of comments on the stories, it did not work out correctly. As for “sucking” it was to AnfiseT, but it turned out that the wrong “answer” button was pressed.
Blush ((((
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Stop it - we know how people blush now)))))))
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I'm here late, but I hope not the last;) I put it off for today, so that I can read everything all at once and with feeling, really, with the arrangement. Now it’s embarrassing to remember about Dreiser with the Tarantinov batch, but still) Take my modest delights and 10-ku.
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What are you all so grabbed in this Dreiser? Well, I didn’t read it, DON'T READ)))) Actually, from the entire list of references, given by Anfisa, I know not only hearsay with Stendahl and even then it was not true for a long time> _ <(I feel, now they will be kicked ...)
But for the enthusiasm - honestly, I waited for your comment ... Thank you, in general))))))))
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Figasse! Is there something you didn't read? O_O)))
I know that I waited. And I always expect yours. Therefore, I apologize for being late)
But really surprised !!!
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I’ve once told you that I’m not really Americans - only the twentieth century and only science fiction plus Hemingway)))))
Surprise is good, this is already a plus)))))
Therefore - thanks twice)))))
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Liked it :) Last time I am drawn to such lovely bastards :)
Catch ten and in addition a bag of respect :)
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Thank you))))) I return Tara from back to Respect?))))))))
Threat I will not give the top ten ... rr-r))))))
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Good story, but due to my age I did not understand the ending. Was it all decreed?
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Yes))))
Thanks for the comment and for willpower)))))))
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