They were spotted, and they rushed up like naughty children, and ran for a long time, giggling with shame, and then Pasha pressed the Goat to the damp brick wall, again exposed it and licked it to squeal and to tears.

She began to go out without clothes, and Pasha caressed her bud, thrusting her fingers under the mini. The goat was so excited that she was ready to scream in front of passersby, and Pasha quickly took her to a secluded corner, where she would end up cruelly under his tongue, whimpering from lust. There he first took her right in the autumn foliage, and she rocked on all fours, dangling her red mane on a golden carpet, and her naked buttocks looked out of the mini, like peach slices from a saucer. Pasha was accustomed to do it with her in the most unimaginable poses and places - in the stairwell, on the staircase, on the railing, on the roof, in the doorways and on the benches. They were fired all the time, and they were ashamed and terrified, as in a dream.

- Will you be my angel? - Pasha whispered to her, playing a medallion brought by her from London. The green angel caused something like déjà vu in him - as if some vague memory twitched in the backs of his memory and immediately hid back ...

The purple fog with the devil gradually departed there, to the back, and a month later Pasha thought - “maybe it wasn’t?” Six months later, nothing remained but a desperate, shrill adoration that sucked Pasha with his head. “I'm in love,” he thought, “for the first time in my life in love. Is it all her hair? ... ”

The date, which Pasha decided to celebrate on a grand scale, approached imperceptibly: the thirteen years of their first sex. (Edik she was filed as “the anniversary of the first date)

It was decided to break away the whole family in an amusement park. The goat screamed and rejoiced almost more than Edik. She was attracted by the most terrible and dangerous slides, which looked more like instruments of torture than of a game.

In one cradle they did not fit, and Pasha had to sit back.

- Take this. You have more space, - happy Goat gave him a bag, and Pasha put it on his shoulder. Inside, there was some nasty draft itch, but Pasha jammed him - “that I, not a man, or something” —and forced himself to smile like everyone else.

The signal boomed, and the multi-colored train, like a long bundle of wieners, started off, quickly accelerating downhill. The red mane of the Goat flew upwind like a pennant.

What happened next, Pasha remembered in fragments, in fragments, as separate frames from the film.

So he sees that the front cradle suddenly rears up, - and screams, and does not hear his voice, and does not know why this is the reason for the wind, or he, Pasha, is numb and deaf ...

Here is a cradle with a red pennant reclining somewhere to the side, and he himself flies to some unknown destination, and flies into a deafening chime, which has squeezed all the bones out of him, and thinks: “I fell. Strange, why not hurt ... "

Here is the blackness, crawling with wadded pieces, and through it - faces, voices, movement, shaking, and finally - pain, sticky pain where it is not clear.

Here again blackness, and again, and again, again, and voices, and whisper somewhere near:

- In the shirt was born. We will pay - it will be as good as new. But how can he say something, eh? About the wife and son?

***

At times he fell into a dream, and there, in the purple blackness, an invisible flame hummed, and a familiar voice said to him:

- That's all. Pouted, Pavel Ilyich. Everything, as I said. Well, poked! See you soon.

When he was discharged, his mother took him to the cemetery, and Pasha looked at two neat graves, not understanding what relationship they had to Goat and Edik. He quit his job, fed through the stump-deck, did not clean anything, and was overgrown with a terrible red bristle, which he flatly refused to shave.

- This is a sign from her. I am black, and she was red, - he told his mother, who carried him food.

For weeks, he was engaged in going around the house, sorting things out and remembering. The emptiness that surrounded him was like a bad dream, and he couldn’t believe it at all, and for some reason all the time it seemed that something could be done, that's just not clear what it was.

At night, he was addicted to hanging online and swallowing movies - the dumber the better. One day, he came across a regular "saga" and curled up, looking at swords, white robes and other trash, familiar to nausea.

He did not even immediately remember that he had once seen this film, but when he remembered, he could not understand where he had turned off, and drove the slider back and forth until he spat and began to look from the middle - just from the place where they took away from the angel eternal life in exchange for the love of the knight. And the memory of the angelic past was also taken away from her. (Erotic stories) And the angelic tenderness was taken away: they say, it will return to you only if your knight himself will be gentle with you, like a cloud in his pants. Then she even succeeded in marrying this knight to herself, a decent stupid man, by the way, but she was quickly drawn to the girls, and then to all sorts of things with dark power. Another plagiarism "Little Mermaid", in general.

Having rolled it forward, Pasha found out that this angel would sacrifice himself, which would be enough to atone for all the sins of a woe-knight and start all over again, and that almost all earthly girls are in fact such former angels. Bullshit...

Instead of dispelling melancholy, the film somehow strengthened it, so much so that it became unbearable, like a toothache. Having cut down the cinema, Pasha sat for a while without movement, and then suddenly he fell on his knees:

“God,” he howled, “well, it can't be.” Well, let me somehow understand. Give me some sign. Give me a sign!..

A mobile phone rang from somewhere. "Wart-wart-wart ..."

It was a goat mobile phone.

For a moment Pasha continued to sit, and then he jumped and rushed about the room.

Running around the whole house, he finally grabbed the bag he was holding before the accident and turned it on the sofa. From there fell silver Nokia and the angel.

Nokia went out in his hands, and Pasha started spinning in search of charging. For some reason it seemed to him very important to find out who called.

Having finally inserted the mobile phone into the network and damned everything, while it was loading, he opened the list of calls ...

Called mom.

Just mom ...

- ... Pashun? Here's a wizard that called back. You don't take the phone, so I ... here ... I see the light is on you ... you ... lie down, okay? OK, Pashun?

Dropping it, he began to clap thoughtlessly with buttons.

Menu, Calendar, Notes, again Menu, File Manager, My Documents ... Bancing. doc, Market_Researches_2014. doc, bullshit. doc ...

Hm

The finger pressed “enter” by itself, and Pasha bit his lip.

"The second attempt in life to keep a diary" - he read a monologue of a man who was no longer there. - "Well. Two weeks ago, I met her. Old black woman. Bomzhiha, our way. Sick.

She was taken to the hospital. Paid, of course. And then she died. A heart.

Before death caused me.

“Here, the lady says, I have something for you. Let it be with you. Good heart, beautiful face. Let it be with you. ”

And gives me this thing.

“She has many centuries. So said Grandma. But not this valuable. See the wings? At dawn, you need to wait for the first ray and face the sun, and take it in hand, and close your eyes, and say: Lord, fulfill my most important desire. And after that, lie down and fall asleep. The Lord will hear, and everything will come true, as you wake up. So Grandma said, and Grandma told her. Let it be with you. ”

“But why don't you take advantage?”

“I have no desires, lady. It has long been gone. I want to go back. I'm tired".

And then she died. And I was terrible.

Because I have such a desire.

That night I did it. Lord, I said. Make me not to be this shy fool anymore. So that I would be what he likes. Give me, Lord, such beauty as he likes.

When I woke up, my hair grew half a inch. Now almost to the shoulders. Never did that grow.

And - I could. I wrote to him on Skype, wrote everything, almost everything. And it was not at all as difficult as I thought. It was..."

Without having finished reading, Pasha rushed to the laptop - to watch when it was dawn.

Two minutes later, he stood at the window, clutching an angel, and said to himself:

- Lord. Lord Give it back to me ...

Then he lay down on the sofa - and immediately fell asleep.

***

There was a devil again. He said something, grinned, waved his hands, but Pasha floated up, and he shouted below, and again appeared opposite, and Pasha sailed away again, leaving him under his feet, and again, and again ...

“Shit on my son,” he seemed to hear. - Only about his woman thinks. He can not go to the top level. Did not deserve...

But Pasha rose like an elevator, until the purple dusk enveloped him, did not thicken to hardness and rang with his name - “Pashutka, Pashutka ...”

- ... Pashutka! Pashutka! Well, stop sleep already, damn it! Are you a woodchuck or are you a man? Pash! Well Paaaaaash! ..

Pasha opened his eyes.

Before him was a shorn head, painfully familiar and forgotten at the same time.

Not understanding anything, Pasha was looking at her.

- Did not find out, yes? Well, Pashutka, now you have to hang yourself.

Pasha silently looked at her.

- Eh! You are some kind of sad ... You ...

Suddenly he grabbed her and threw her into bed.

- Uh! What are you doing? ... Let me tell you what it is ... "the Goat puffed, dodging kisses.

But Pasha saw her smile.

- Will we have a baby? - he asked.

- You ... how did you know ?!

- I found out. “Pasha undressed her and put her lips into a warm body, trying to feel it to the last cell.

The dream, which pressed him, went nowhere, disappeared from memory, and again forgotten things, thoughts and feelings, so strange for Pasha from a nightmare, but ordinary and kind for a man of seventeen years old, took their places.