Having gathered after bathing already on the shore, we began to discuss the domestic aspect of our plans for the evening. If you go to the disco, then the family will have to return from it already in the dark and the problem of flashlights arises. And if we go to Utrish with an overnight stay, then we have only one double tent for six of us. In the end, it was decided that each of the returning family members in the evening should charge their mobile phone to the fullest so that the lighting would be enough for the whole way. And on Utrish they just decided to take a tent just in case, and then it will be seen: what and how.

Christina announced:

- I would like to ask two slippery questions: the first question is for husbands, and the second question is for wives.

“Wow, it seems Christina decided to take the bulls by the horns,” I thought to myself.

- My question to Victor and Yuri: "How do you feel about charming womanizer, including the pick-up artist?"

The men looked at each other in surprise. And Irina and Vika, on the contrary, immediately merry at the unexpected turn of the topic.

- Yes, I personally do not belong. They have their own lives, I have my own, ”said Viktor Ivanovich, somewhat discouraged.

- And I, and I, and I have the same opinion, - Yuri echoed him.

- No, you really do not excuse yourself and let us be pricked to the full. Do you want to be charming and successful womanizer in the deepest depth of your soul? - began to insist Vika.

“Vika, if I say that, of course,“ no ”, - as a psychologist, would you believe this? - Yuri asked his wife.

“Actually, I won't believe it,” Vika admitted.

- I do not believe in this either, and I believe that let husbands be better women in the heart than in reality. Do not castrate us for thoughts that were not expressed or manifested in actions, Irina said conciliatingly.

- Anything, just do not change men hormones !!! We do not want to turn into something asexual to the joy of feminists, - Yuri began to jerk.

- In fact, in modern society, men become womanizer from the fear of long-term intimate relationships, from the fear of strong emotional dependence. There are always some personal, long and deeply experienced reason for low self-esteem. And by continual attempts to win the sympathy of women, the womanmakers try to raise this self-esteem, ”Vika explained.

- You want to say that uncomplexed men can not be a womanizer? - Victor Ivanovich was surprised.

- Of the psychological reasons for the behavior of a womanizer, high-problem relationships with his mother, aunt, or older sister are most common in childhood. As an adult, a womanizer still continues to try to prove to women his superiority, treating women as "a conqueror for at least an hour." A womanizer woman at the same time and attract, and scare. Their relationship with women is a constant duel with some kind of shadow from their past. But, however, there may be other reasons. Once in the environment of the womanizer, in which the consumer attitude towards a woman is a social norm, you will become a womanizer in captivity.

- Vika, here you are not quite right. Most of my male acquaintances love to position themselves as successful womanizer. At least in words.Mentions of mistresses to the place and out of place - this can be said, the social norm of male communities. But personally, I never had the need to sacrifice the quality of relationships with girls for the sake of the number of sexual relationships.

- Victor, you are simply “a person not from the crowd”, since you do not succumb to the banal stereotypes of the majority. You are self-sufficient and you do not need to prove yourself their usefulness to yourself. For this eccentricity of you, Irina chose her husband, ”Vika retorted.

- Is it possible to rehabilitate a womanizer? - I asked.

- It is theoretically possible, but the adjustment of the behavior of a womanizer is a titanic work and almost always it is empty efforts. So it’s more effective to search for someone who is himself looking for a strong emotional dependence on you, but at the same time does not lower himself to the position of henpecked. The one who is looking for a couple to himself, and not another sacrifice for himself fearful, - explained Vika.

- How to understand who is a pair to you? - asked Christina.

- Is that your second question?

- No, this is a clarification to the first question.

- First you need to understand who you are by your psycho, what are your strengths and vulnerabilities, what are your temperaments, etc. Then decide which pair you need - with or without rotation of roles. Looks like you need a couple with a rotation of roles. And only after that then you will understand what type of guy you are missing before the couple. There are no guys who would be equally well suited to all the girls in a long-term stable couple. And in an unstable pair any womanizer fits ...

- Yes, I somehow have already acted out of instability in a pair - let it be better for other girls to peck at the womanizer, - Christina growled.

- But correctly creating a couple for yourself is far from everything for a stable relationship. Looking for more common for a couple of projects. I do not get tired of repeating and repeating to those who ask me for advice on personal life, the brilliant aphorism of Saint-Exupery: “To love is not to look at each other. To love means to look in one direction together. ” In the direction of the overall project for the couple. If there are no common projects linking each other, the pair will eventually disperse in different directions.

For a while, everyone was silent.

- By the way, why did you mention the pick-ups in your question? - asked Christina Irina.

- Yes, when I was angry with my ex, I went to Manezhnaya Square. I read on the Internet that it is a tusovochny place at the Moscow pick up artist. Well, there I was quickly "removed." Spoke all that inexperienced girl would like to hear and use.

- Did you just throw two for sex?

- Well no. It was just two times.

- And what is the second slippery question you had for me and Vika?

- Yes, I did not want to ask him something, - said Christina.

- No, - exclaimed Vika, - once I gave a hint, then let's voice it.

- Oh well. I wanted to ask you about your attitude to the swingers.

And then came the dumb scene, as if Christine had uttered some taboo word. Irina exchanged glances, first with Vika, then with men. Yuri coughed into a fist - apparently, to relieve tension. One Vika remained outwardly calm and told Christine:

- You voluntarily or involuntarily touched on a topic that is sensitive for us now.

- I accidentally, I'm sorry.

- Yes, it's not about you, but about us. In our two pairs. We are not swingers. In our quartet, I only have the experience of swinging, and even that is quite old. Still student times, when I was completely reckless.

Vika fell silent, obviously thinking about what to say next or whether to say at all. Then she said:

- If you want, I can tell you about this long-standing experience.

- Actually, I would be very curious.

- It was at the beginning of the second year. I was approached with an unexpected request by a familiar fourth-year student from the Department of Family Psychology. Her name was Alex. He planned to take sex as a regulator of family relations as the theme of his diploma. The topic is delicate - and it is quite difficult to directly collect primary objective information on it in sufficient quantity for a diploma.Alexey came up with a non-standard scheme for collecting information through an interview with swingers couples disguised as a swingers couple. And he needed a sexy partner with whom she could portray lovers seeking appropriate contact with like-minded people. Alexey also invited me to this role.

- portray in conversation or in bed? - Cristina asked for clarification.

- During conversation. Russian swingers couples usually meet first in a cafe. Alexei said that acquaintance specifically for the swing of previously unknown couples is a feature of the Russian swing. And in America, for example, couples that have long been known for a long time ...