It happened in the past millennium, but not a thousand, but only forty years ago. I did not change the name of the protagonist, he has long been gone in this world.

My friend and I were fishing in the pond. An hour and a half ago, the shepherds drove a country flock through the dam, which means that time was nearing nine. The sun burned his head, crucian almost did not peck. We, silently, looked at the floats.

Last night, alluviation of the moths and preparing the fishing rods, Sasha and I went to sleep on the veranda of his house on an old razdolbanny sofa. The veranda was glazed, and had two doors; one to the street, the other to the apartment. The time was nearing twelve at night, but did not want to sleep. At first, we were just talking about some of our boyish affairs and remembering the most ridiculous events - we laughed, then began to push each other, and finally, clutching at the fight, ran down from the sofa onto the concrete floor of the veranda. The apartment door opened: “Boys, you have to wake up tomorrow at four in the morning. Sasha, if you do not stop making noise, you will go to sleep in your room. ” Valentina Vasilyevna strictly looked at us. Jumping up from the floor, we lay down on the sofa.

Sashkina's mother, having stood for a few more seconds, is gone.

Five minutes later, Sashka was already dry without hind legs; a few minutes later I fell asleep.

Waking up from a harsh and disgusting rattling alarm clock, I reached out to him and, pressing the button, sat on the couch. I wanted to sleep as if I had never slept before. Hardly overcoming the desire to fall on the couch and sleep on, turned and began to shake Sasha. Pushing my hand away and moaning something, he dug under the pillow.

Knowing that he hears me, I said: "We will come again to the pond not the first." Sasha sat down. It was a pity to look at him. Finally, having come to himself and wearing tights and sneakers, Sashka got up and we went out through the street door and took our gear, went to the pond.

"Great guys!"

Kolka Chepik, the village joker and the merry fellow looked at us, smiling.

Kolka was our rustic. After graduating from the eight-year, before the army he worked on the state farm: on the farm, the current, on the stable; generally laborer. After the army he returned to the state farm, got married and, after working again as a laborer, he resigned from the state farm and got a loader at the base of the regional consumer union. It was impossible to get to the base even as a loader and even in those Soviet times, without having cronyism. But Kolka had some kind of distant kindred, the seventh water on kissel, Sasha's father, and Sashkin's father was the director of the base.

This is where Kolka started having a merry and wild life.

Not to say that Kolka was such a handsomely written man: his face was round, his skin was white, his blond beard curled and his rebelliously knocked out from under his cap. Kohl was complicated; his shoulders were wide and his chest was a wheel; he walked slightly along; navy habit. Kolka was like a merry man, he knew a bunch of obscene jokes, sayings and jokes, he didn’t climb into his pocket and the girls liked him. And even though Kolka was married, he had two children, but he could not pass by the skirt of some attractive blonde or brunette who was yearning for male affection and which was abundant on the basis of the regional consumer union. From one of these sluts and caught Kolka Tripper.

Sashka told me about it, and he overheard how Kolka told his father. It was funny, even in Sashkin's retelling, I imagine how Kolka was joking about this.

Lyubka-razvedenka worked as a storekeeper. She was under thirty. Kohl pointed out where to put the boxes, and where the bags and all the time bent before him, as if picking up something from the floor. Lyubka was attractive, and the pose was seductive and Kolka could not restrain himself and slapped the rounded bottom of the pope, as if pushing it aside to go with the box. The palm seemed stuck to her ass, and Lyubka froze, but did not move away and did not straighten, but just looked around and licked her lips, smiling. Here Kolka departed, dropping directly onto sacks of flour.

Choking, and choking with laughter, they were shaking off the flour from each other. Lyubkin's eyes glittered, she brazenly pressed herself against Kolka, rubbed her pubis and pulled her to her. But Kolka pushed her away and, grumbling: "Lunch," left.

We worked in shifts and for the next three days Kolka did not meet with Lyubka.

But on the third day, Kolka suddenly noticed that the urge to urinate became too frequent, and a week later a burning sensation appeared in the urethra. Sensing something was wrong, and afraid of his wife, Kolka began to sleep separately, pretending that he was tired and then drunk. Lyubka bypassed, trying not to meet. When after seven days the burning sensation had not passed and the urge to urinate did not diminish, Kolka went to see a urologist at the district clinic. The gray-haired doctor, asking why he came and took a smear from Kolka, and warned him to abstain with his wife, told him to come to the reception in three days.

“Well, my dear, congratulations, they picked up a tripper!” - the doctor, smiling, looked at Kolka through his glasses. “Nute-s” - rubbing his hands, he said: “we will be treated ?!” Writing out Kolka's prescription, the doctor said: “Give me the name of your lady, your date of birth and her address. She also needs to undergo treatment. ”

“Lyubka,” said Kolka, and fell silent, staring at the doctor.

Without waiting for the continuation, the doctor looked up and gruffly asked: "Drunk?". Kolka shook his head and felt his ears catch fire. The doctor, noticing the embarrassment of the patient, looked at him in surprise.

"Okay. Tell your lady to come to me at the reception. ”

Writing a prescription and explaining how to take pills, the doctor ordered: "Take off your clothes."

“Lift the pants and shorts,” - noticing that Kolka pulled, he was wearing his shirt, the doctor said. Turning to the glass cabinet, he pulled a rod out of it, with a brush from the line at the end. "Shompol" - for some reason thought Kolka, and yatra shrank. Wrapping the rough tip of the ramrod with a cotton swab and dipping in some yellowish ointment, the doctor turned to Kolka and said: “Let’s get your farm here, we’ll clean it”

Later, telling friends about this procedure, Kolka did not even smile. But the men rolled with laughter.

“Pulls off a member, puts this ramrod into it and starts to eboshit them like in that rifle. My soul turns inside out, and he huyarit and sentences: “Be patient, Cossack tolerate, your member will swell, but after a week everything will pass, but my wife will love; with a condom can. "

“What love is there; Pebble said, until you heal, do not even breathe in my direction! ”

Surprisingly Kolka, the wife responded almost calmly, saying only that he should resign from the base and get a job at the state farm.

Before leaving Kolka went to the warehouse to Lyubaha. She wrote something in a journal and smiled when she saw Kolka. Going to the table, he grabbed her breasts and poked her fist in the face. Lyubka, gasping, fell into bags. Kolka, roughly, lifted her by the collar and, looking into the eyes widening in horror, hissed: “Bitch, you infected me with clap; if you don’t go for treatment, I’ll choke ”. He spat in the face and, straightening his suit, left.

Kolka disappeared in early October.

September that year was sunny, without rain. Harvesting finished in agrotechnical terms. They dug up potatoes, poured them into cellars; coped with the gardens.

Combines and tractors requiring routine repairs were driven into the workshop; the rest of the equipment, prepared for winter, stood in rows on the street, in the fenced yard of the workshop.

A period of vacations began at the state farm.

He took a vacation and Kolka.

A public bath in the village was given twice a week: on Friday and Saturday, Thursday was added to the sweeper. And although Kolka had a bathhouse, he still went to the sovkhoz farm to steam up.

The bathing day was Saturday, but this time he went on a Friday, since the holiday began on Saturday. In those years, beer was sold right in the bath. Kolka, steaming and drinking a couple of bottles of beer, went home. Having a rest a little, I remembered that I hadn’t been visiting a godfather for a long time. The reason, this time, was ...