August 11

The call to the cell woke up. I fell asleep in front of the screen without undressing. As he got up, his own smell smacked his nose. With a terrible hangover, with a smoke break such that it seems that even exhale cigarette smoke. It was disgusting to hell. What has become?

He picked up the phone and winced at the scream in the dynamics.

“Zhevtun,” shouted the head of the SOG Taras, “where have you gone?” You should have a bribe case tomorrow in court, and you haven't even filed a charge yet. The defendant in the evening will have to release. And Kopytko on a business trip faded. Will you order me to work for all of you? Oh, to the east would you parasites send. There would have jumped bunnies.

Wow ... it doused me like icy water. I am the first wave of mobilization successfully profilonil.

“I'll be there in an hour,” he grunted into the phone and turned off.

While he was standing under the burning water jets, everyone was trying to understand why my whole life was like a chewed sandwich. Who am I up there not pleased?

Out of the shower came out of the womb: fresh, like a cucumber. Safe opened, looked at his ammunition with pleasure. Hunting carbine - AK 47, 1972 year of release. It has been altered a little so that it doesn’t be fired by bursts, but nothing ... for those who need it, and there will be enough singles. Yes, I hid the striker's larva somewhere, so that my son did not accidentally shoot. And then he is my curiously curious.

Barely came to work, immediately Taras came running. As he came running, he began to shout, like a victim.

“Sha,” I told him, “is the last interrogation, and I charge this“ hauler ”rag. I have all the proof for a long time collected. Tomorrow morning I bring the case to court.

Taras was relieved from her heart. He sat down on the opposite chair and sat, fanning himself with his five.

- Kopyt something not responding - told me. - I also wanted to send him to hell, and the phone was turned off.

- Washed down, probably, - I grunted. - Or on whores spree.

Taras smiled broadly, and then laughed altogether.

- Right. He loves this thing very much.

Already at the exit, the head turned and, slyly squinting, suddenly asked:

- Why did Anke break your nose?

His wife is injured as a nurse works. Looks like my faithful she had time to cry.

“Earned,” I replied.

Taras shook his head:

- Well, sometimes it’s necessary. Sometimes they don't understand anything other than that. And Anka is yours and even more so ...

Then it became interesting to me. It’s interesting that I even got up from the chair and went up to Taras.

- Are you also fucking with her?

- What are you, Roma? - sincerely surprised Taras. - How could you think? Rumors went, no more. Gossip...

He patted me on the shoulder and shut the door behind him. Rumors means. I wonder why they did not reach me?

“Anya,” I asked her on the first evening, when I accompanied her home, “but what do you most want?”

I remember how she smiled. And from this smile instead of the Moon the Sun appeared in the sky. Yes, so bright that I already closed my eyes.

“Marry you,” she replied.

No sooner said than done. Two months later, the wedding was played. I then just got an older person and transferred from full-time interns to SOG. On the owner of the cafe where the wedding thundered, I was already proving collected. Yes, I was stopped by the arm; the then prosecutor was involved in that case. Which then went to the area.

And I was drunk then hell. He took the microphone to say the greeting word of the groom, and blurted out his foolish words:

- I'm on the site of this cafe still on the tank dance.

Wow and they were scared. I can not charge a tezvyak without looking, and I don’t know how to get drunk.

And the rumors reached, but I did not want to believe them. Everyone thought they were jealous of my happiness. What revenge for something.

So it was the ninth. On the tenth evening, I went to visit the pastor whistling. He did not want to open the gate to me, of course, but yes this is a simple matter. With a leg hit, but she flew off the loop.

Yes, I also fed him a dog with an isoniazid feed in the morning so that he would not be confused under my feet.

The owner hid from me in the bedroom.Under the bed. Like a child, by golly. You might think I won't find him there.

“Get out, Father,” I shouted. - Get out, otherwise it will be worse. In general, then I fucked the house. Fry like Joan of Arc.

Father grunted, muttered something, but got out from under the bed. All covered with dust, the eyes are bad.

“Roma, my son,” began this paskudnik to preach. - Remember, I warned you.

I made surprised round eyes:

- What are you, holy father, do you think that I came to kill you? You baptized me. How can you? I came to talk. Talk, watch a movie and clean up your dirty soul of demons.

Believe, fool. Relaxed, sighed freely.

“Roma,” his balalaika started again, “women are evil.” Remember how Ecclesiastes spoke ...

Here I am under his breath and charged. He lured me with his Ecclesiastes naturally. The pastor doubled over, letting air out of his lungs with a whistle. Just in case, I still shook him. In order not to interfere.

Then he sat down on a chair (heavy, bastard. Not otherwise he did not observe a single post, the righteous man), put a sheet on it. While the pastor sighed out of the way, I found an adhesive tape with him. On top of the sheets, like a cocoon taped. Away away, I admired my work. Beauty!

He did not seal his mouth, let him speak, otherwise it will become boring for me. And I am a funny guy, I really like to talk. Only the windows were touched up tightly so as not to wake up the neighbors inadvertently.

In the meantime, in his living room, I had to break through the boxes in search of kinoshek, from 18 years old to infinity, the pastor woke up.

“Roman,” I heard his voice, “don't go crazy.” Let's talk.

“Let's talk, talk,” I muttered. - Before dawn long, have time to talk a little.

On the threshold of the bedroom, I appeared radiant, like a ship’s bell. With a laptop at your side and three discs in your hand. It seems that the father managed to get rid of most of them. But these somehow zanykal. Goon, one word.

- Ready? - I asked the prisoner. - Begins a session for adults.

He put the laptop on the nightstand opposite his chair, plugged in and charged. He himself lay down on the pastor's bed without a sheet and threw his legs in berets on the pillows.

“Roma, do not,” the father whined. - Forgive me, I do not know what she did to me. Like demons moved into it.

“Shhhhhh,” I stopped him. - Now the fun will begin.

The most interesting has begun. But not what even I expected. I was on a business trip to the east with Taras then. Investigated war crimes. Bitch, I almost crashed there. And these...

On the marital bed, under the wedding photo. In the other room the children were snorting peacefully. My kids!

There was one pastor. Everything in the camera shone with its milky belly, but with a loose ass.

- Roma ..., - this cattle ached, - I'll explain everything to you.

I silently got up, went to the barn and brought out a canister of gasoline. When this bastard saw what I had come with, his hair began to move.

“You won't do this,” he murmured. - I baptized you.

“That's why,” I replied, “now it's your turn.” Only I will baptize not with water, but with a flame of purification. It is necessary for you, father, to appear clean before the Lord. And what treats all spiritual evil the best? Only fire.

Padre sat, doused with fuel. Blowing his eyes and blood rapidly drained from his face.

“I am not a beast,” I warned him for some reason. - I'll give you the last word. Speak

Turned on the voice recorder on the cell and prepared to listen. The pastor screamed an owl, danced his lips and suddenly laughed. Crazy laughter of a madman.

- The last word? So will you my last word. DNA to children make a moron. She was having fun with us without prezics. They annoyed her.

I walked away, looked into the wild, crazy, watery eyes of my spiritual mentor, struck a lighter of flint and threw it into a cocoon.

And I'll see my dad tomorrow. I really want to know why my children are so similar to my handsome - dog daddy.

August 12

- Zhevtun, - Taras flew into the office, - heard that the preacher's house burned down?

- I heard.

- They say that someone helped to set fire.

- Do not care.

Taras sat on the chair opposite and looked at me intently. I made the most innocent face and went over the papers on the table. He put something in the table, sent something to the urn.

“You have nothing to do with this, right?” - asked the boss.

- I was asleep.

- I believe. What's happening with you? This is because of Anka, right?

I looked up at him hard. Taras started and even slightly moved away with the chair.

- Why did I not know anything? - I asked him.

The boss got up and went to the wall.

- Baba had to get married. Children to give birth and all that jazz. And from our nobody took it. And you lived in Kiev for six years. While I was studying at KSU, I worked somewhere there. Then I received an appointment here. You left, she was snot thirteen years old. Only then came into full force. Well, and ... until it is completely erased, I decided to choke you. You were so principled. One and for life. So she became for you the very - the first. This Vitalik invented.

I rose slowly. He rested his palms on the table and stared at Taras. I do not know what he read in my eyes, but he turned as pale as a sheet.

“Don't be fooled,” he raised his palms. - I have a suggestion for you.

Okay, I will listen, although I am too busy. I have no time.

“We know,” began Taras, “that Kopytko is your job.” And the pastor too. Anka is sitting at home and is afraid to stick her nose out into the street. What do you want? To sweep? Well, let me bring her to you on the lasso, but you will have her ripped off to a pulp. Then calm down?

I even had fun at his words. You would think if I wanted to kill her, I would not.

- you what? - I answered Taras. - What are you offering me? She is a holy woman. She damn her, the mother of my children. At least I hope so.

Taras sighed heavily, looked at me with pity and spoke again:

“Then we have no choice but to surrender you.” Roma, do you understand what you have done?

It made me even funnier. And the situation seems tragic, and I laugh like a fool. Even the water from the carafe drank to stop this silly laughter. He wiped his mouth and looked merrily at his superior.

- Taras, do you know me, the first day you know? He himself taught a lot. So, I'm not going to jail alone. All follow me. Including the donkey, which is now in the area. And I will scribble “upright” like that Singer sewing machine. Without tired, that is. And all the cooperation with the investigation vow I promise you right here.

“In general, I somewhere thought so,” answered Taras. - Therefore, we have option B. Even two options B. Either an accident, or ... you do not want to give your homeland a debt?

- What is the debt? - I was surprised. - And what do you think I've been doing for almost thirteen years now, if I have not distributed debts to my motherland?

- You have good chances to survive. And as you return, there and all your shoals will be forgiven. We will try.

It got to me. Finally, at least something came to me.

“Call the military commissar,” I said, “let him write the agenda.” Because I will not leave you alone.

Taras smiled and went out. And I went home to get ready. I know I will not return. Because I do not want to go back. Let dad live. Children need a grandfather.