Anyone who has ever been in the public toilet of some educational institution at least once knows that this is a wonderful place in all respects. First, it can be used for its intended purpose. However, this is not the most important of its function. Secondly, it is possible to smoke here, but even this useful quality is of secondary importance in comparison with the most important side for the students of the public outhouse to serve as a kind of information bridge between people.

Each generation of students considers it a rule to leave a unique entry on its walls. And it is impossible not to feel respect for such a way to keep in touch with the times, since this tradition goes back centuries and began from the primitive man, who was the first to discover the opportunity to express his unique individuality by putting something on the walls of the cave with coal.

There is no doubt that the toilet is the first place for a sample of all future talented artists, poets and wits. Ask the famous artist, and, if he were more reverent, he would have admitted that he began his ascent to fame and recognition from a tiny picture of indecent content, scratched by a nail in the booth of a school toilet in between cases. And if you were sincere with any famous poet, and he would tell you that it was here that the muse of poetic inspiration first visited him. And he will never forget the painful hours spent in this institution, in an attempt to find the right rhyme to the end of the "army."

And it would be foolish not to pay attention to this slice of our culture. After all, there is no place in the world, except for the toilet, where a person is so free in his thoughts and manifestations.

However, enough to theorize, it's time to start our review of the toilet art of one institution of higher education. Later you will find out which one.

We go in the first door with a sign "M", enter at random in any booth and immediately right in front of you read the order: "Go back to the left." It is difficult not to fulfill the request expressed in such a categorical form, and curiosity prevails, we turn left. There we read the following instruction: “Turn to the right.” Well, do not throw the same thing started in the middle of the road, turn right, and read the almost expected: “Turn back”. But it’s really so hard to get the truth back from behind. Preparing for a meeting with this revelation, we turn back and read: “Goat, did you come here to write or spin?”

As it turns out later, this shameless tattoo can be found in every second intimate part. Apparently, it belongs to the so-called toilet classics, with which many who use the public closet are familiar. Who does not know this famous: Let the walls of our toilet Decorate humor and satire

And this is immortal: write on the walls of toilets Alas, friends, no wonder. Among g ... you are all poets, Among the poets you r ...!

“What a mess!” Another puritan exclaims. On the contrary, I say, concern for cleanliness and order is not alien and writing on the walls. Here is an obvious example of concern that you, God forbid, do not overshoot: Come closer - it is shorter than you think.

Or another, which has become a classic, please observe the order: Do not throw the bulls into the toilet bowls, they are difficult to light after that.

Yes, all the same culture and literacy in our people has become more. Again, knowledge of foreign languages ​​was not a rare exception. And where, if not in the closet, show off your foreign. Yes, it is to share the secret of life well-being. For example: If you wonna be OK Fuck your baby every day!

However, not everyone agrees with this statement and write a refutation below: If you want a lot of pleasure Fuck your girl ... as little as possible.

Which of them is right, I can not say.Such worldly wisdom in the form of short aphoristic utterances richly adorn the walls and doors of almost all the toilets: Button your pants, ohlamon, A spy is watching you! This is not anarchy, this is order, his mother! Lead the column going to the x ...!

By the way, an interesting fact. The type of education received undoubtedly affects the characteristics of the messages left. There are inscriptions that can not be found anywhere else, except in certain faculties. For example, this is an example from the law faculty: A. Chikatilo. 1936-1994 We will remember the coolest man!

This gave historians: There is truth from the most eternal And we will repeat again In Russia, the power is a diseased intestine Always crap ready.

Well, this truth was discovered for the world by philosophers: He who does not masturbate does not exist.

But!

But the most interesting thing is that the faculty usually use the same toilets. Can you imagine what they are experiencing when they find out before their eyes that: HJ is always jerking off everywhere, Drooling on land and in water.

Some can not hold back their feelings, get their hands and ... Gentlemen, sexual maniacs, Express yourself differently, Or at least not so rude.

However, witty students do not remain indebted to the professorship. And now above the urinal flaunts the inscription: Professor, in your hands is your past.

But the professors are also not badly baked, and right there above the urinal next

derive the answer: Student, in your hands is your future.

Separately, we will dwell on the vicious phenomenon of homosexuality that has not yet been overcome in our society. You do not need to have a rocket scientist in order to understand that a public toilet is an ideal place to look for unconventional connections. Therefore, certain of them are simply full of inscriptions like: “I want to meet a blue guy no older than 22 years. Boris.” And, of course, a telephone.

But do not rush to call him. It is not excluded that Bor is already over sixty, and he is not blue, but merely the unfortunate teacher of the local educational institution, who was stricter than the student - dunce expected, treated him on exams.

However, there are proposals expressed in a more witty form.

Here it is, say: I am looking for love and friendship. About me: Financially puzzled, anxious about housing, sexually provided.

And here is the poetic outpouring of the blue romance: We knew how to be friends and about something not bed rest, lying next to you for hours talking in the night

And below is some rude barker who summed up the summary:

"So that you are dead, fagots!"

However, not everyone agrees with this, and someone continues to campaign:

“Guys! The best sex is blue, believe me! ”

They believe him, but are interested in:

- Do you take in your mouth?

Ties correspondence:

- I take, and also in the ear, throat, nose.

- So you - ENT.

New members join the correspondence:

"Do not take it in your mouth - the Ministry of Health warns!"

The discussion is growing and expanding, turning into almost a nationwide discussion about whether it is bad or good:

"And I want to take by mouth!"

"Do not give, or what?"

Here and the professorship can not resist and connects to the debate:

"Suck! How unfavorable this is! This is simply outrageous. ”

Radical sexual orthodoxies join their indignation:

“I want to get acquainted with an active or passive homosexual to give him in the face.”

Or:

“I am looking for a gay guy. I will find - I will cut.

But homosexuals, too, are not asleep and respond to attacks with a neat hole in the wall leading to the next booth. And so that no one doubts why it is, next to it is stated: “Hole. Suva here and take too here. ”

Phew That's disgusting! However, enough about the blue. Let's talk better about women's toilets.

The number of inscriptions and drawings in women's toilets will hardly concede in content and number of men's toilets. Some girls even self-wonderfully abound in inscriptions and exclaim:

“Ah, why do we need these doors?”

“So that you, fool, wrote here,” explains another.

Immediately connects the third, and went and went:

- Are you not interested in the consonance of the verbs "write" and "write"?

- It sounds tempting.

- And I want love, big and clean!

- Girl! The size is not so important, and the cleanliness is run by the sanitary epidemiological station.

- I want to work in this sanitary epidemiological station. And by the way, I'm not a girl. My soul is already old ...

But the dialogue is rudely interrupted by the cleaning woman and, having put in a lot of work, she washes away Babs' idle talk with a cloth. And in vain, the next day, a fresh inscription appears:

- Oh, babonki, again we must start all over again, and then through the whole wall draws his cry from the heart: "I am dissatisfied!"

By the way, here I must say that, unlike the men's in the ladies' room, the inscriptions are more soulful and lyrical. This is understandable, women more subtly feel and express accordingly: I am in love, and life is wonderful, although I know that he is a goat.

And in general in the women often write about love. Someone, for example, finally got her current friend, and she agrees to part with it, although not for free: "I sell the sofa with the sailor." Others continue this gimp with love: “But I’m suffering suffer. I love him, and he is blue. ” Well, someone has already found a way out for themselves: “Fools, I tried it with a sixty year old. This is amazing!"

Although some kind of splinter didn’t hold back here either, apparently, it envied someone else’s happiness and added a spoonful of tar: “Is he shaking you or was he shaking you?” Probably, it was someone from those who asked below: “Girls , and lesbians there?

After reading this, of course you can not refrain from exclamation. What it was that the male and female toilets are separated from each other! After all, in the men's toilets there are enough declarations of love, which the object of the senses, alas, will never read.

For example, such a sad inscription: Sasha loves Masha, and Masha loves Mamba.

Doesn’t it, from this recognition blows real human tragedy? Or such a reproach to his girlfriend: You, Alyonushka, painfully proud, Tits soft ass hard.

Can you imagine how interesting the correspondence could be, read Alyonushka such.

But most of all I was struck by the inscription in the women's toilet, which would not be ashamed to decorate with themselves and a haven of men's needs. Here it is: cold vodka is the best drink It warms your soul. If vodka interferes with learning, Drop the hell out of your studies.

Unfortunately, I didn’t manage to make more entries in the women's toilet, as I was driven out in disgrace by the girls who had come to smoke. And I want to finish this study with a wonderful phrase written in one of the toilets and addressed to all visitors of the toilets of all educational institutions (last word changed): O you, reading this, well, why are you such a fool?

But I would add “writing”.

Yes, I almost forgot. It remains for me to say that all rights to the inscriptions given in my research belong to the toilets and smoking rooms of the Moscow State University.