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Comment on publication: Abandoned building
In general, I immediately understood that you hinted at brevity as a flaw, but the fact is that in my understanding such stories should be described as a case - circumstances, description, and the actions themselves. When I myself watch stories, those in which more than 3 pages are no longer read. From positive, my story starts, if you look at the situation described by the eyes of the guys, although in general this is my first story written on behalf of the girl, so some flaws can certainly be, I do not deny.
Comment on publication: Abandoned building
It is. And what's the point of stretching stories on 6 pages for example?
Comment on publication: Abandoned building
Comment on what if you think there are flaws in this story.
Comment on publication: Separate flat
Do not read, do not spoil the site with annoying comments.
Comment on publication: From Goethe
Pictures are picked up disgusting, on the spot killing all possible desire. Again, the times of the 20th century, in which there was nothing interesting, what is the point of clinging to them? In addition, the sex itself is described very ugly, do you like to excite negative in the readers?