Professor Ivan Nikolaevich loved wealth and the life corresponding to it. But at the dawn of his youth, when he was still a medical student, he had nothing but a briefcase with which he ran to the institute. In those days, it was rare for someone to stretch out his hand to a beautiful, but alien property, realizing that someone would hardly thank him for stealing such a thing. But women, oh, these women, they always and everywhere contradicted the men standing in the property of others, as knights at a crossroads, wondering how much they could give for the theft of a handsome monument, under which probably was not the heroic defender of their Homeland, but simple, but very rich in his time merchant. However, after thinking carefully, a good fellow Ivan did not dare to get into the number of robbers of monuments, although beautiful Helen did not give him a breath so as not to frighten him with a three-fingered whistle at his grandmother and God’s soul for such indecisiveness, when good fellow Ivan returned home with neither than. But it was a long time ago, a long time ago, a very ...

But now, when capitalism reappeared in the country, and everyone was actually allowed to carry into his pocket everything that he wanted or was lying badly, but for some reason he did not want to be a thief oligarch, to which his wife snaked: “What? Afraid of the law, thief fucking? And God pulled me to marry such a coward?! ...

But in our family, Ivan Nikolaevich, there was never any disagreement in his life: he loved his wife and used her body at night in various poses. To which she simply was silent so as not to give birth to the idea of ​​her female infidelity to her husband in her husband’s head, as her boyfriend, Vitka Mikhailov, didn’t stop her when he started fucking at a convenient time for him, when he himself was already fifty fucked.

“You are my favorite goat,” he whispered in her ear at night when her husband was away on a business trip. Eh! How many people brought grief and disappointment to the word “business trip”, although some came home in the morning, telling his wife that he was so late at work when he and his boss were counting the profits from the project he had proposed using the legal method of taking someone else's money. But our hero was a tyukha and never reached such heights. Apparently he did not have those wings that carried him only to the door of his car and back. And then suddenly his wife told him that in their apartment, which they had recently bought, there was one major drawback ...

... which one? - the husband did not understand, being surprised at such an irrelevant question, when the chief dispatcher of the bus depot, Viktor Mikhailov, sat at their table with his good wives wife, who for some reason called her simply and clearly a fool in their house. But it was she who put forward the idea of ​​some restructuring in their apartment, which the hostess liked very much, but for some reason did not receive support from her husband. And the question was put bluntly: Is it worth expanding the bathroom by removing the partition between the toilet?

- This is not hygienic! - cut off husband ...

“But much more spacious than now,” the wife retorted.

- And who did you advise? I do not believe that this is your personal initiative, - the husband chopped back with words, hoping that with his perseverance he would convince his wife. But she snapped like a dog from a booth: "There is not enough space in the bathroom and that's it!".

- Not! You wait. The bath was placed, however, almost resting against the wall, but we bathed in it and there were no complaints ...

The wife, she began to say that not all people are the height of her husband, but a person like the tall and respected Viktor Mikhailov is unlikely to fit in if the bathroom comes out of work at home. Then she would have helped them out with her bathroom, but Victor would hardly fit in such a bath where the wall of the toilet stands against her ...

- Okay. We'll see., - the husband suddenly answered, actually having caught the stupid wife for trying to hide her sex with Vitka, to whom he was jealous of his beloved wife from the first year of the institute ...

Time passed, but there was no day that the wife did not remind her husband of his consent to remove the wall ... Finally, he could not stand this whining and the next day two healthy young men came, for whom it was much easier to break than to build, and they three hours removed the partition, connecting the bathroom to the toilet. When they dragged out all the rubbish and got the money, retreating, our heroine was delighted that now her joy, Viktor Mikhailov, would surely fit in the bathroom, hanging his riotous head ...

In the evening, when her faithful husband came, who congratulated her on the victory, and she invited him to try the bath together for sex. The husband, for some reason, quickly agreed, but grumbled that now you would not sit on the toilet while someone was lying in the bath. He fucked his wife in different poses, kissed her between her legs, calling her a good girl that she so brilliantly decided that her mind was superior to her uncomfortable way of life. All would be nothing, and in this would put an end to this narration about the genius of some women, who think that they have surpassed men, if not a single “But”. What happened can happen to each of us. My husband suddenly had a stomachache, and he did not go to work, struggling with the legwork on the toilet and back. The wife first laughed at her husband, but soon she, too, was not amused. She wanted more, but the toilet was now in the bathroom and it was simply impossible to give her husband her sweet booty, which he often kissed and fucked.

- you soon ?! - Shouted his wife through the keyhole.

- And you are not with me, but ask her! - the husband answered loudly, exulting that he so skillfully faked his wife.

His wife had been running around the apartment for almost an hour, but the toilet had remained so unattainable for her this hour as the flight to the moon.

- Well! Are you coming soon Or die on a push?

- Everything can be! The ways of God are inscrutable, - the husband answered strictly, gritting his teeth ...

- Not! So it will not go on! - the wife decided and, seizing the trash can, jumped out onto the balcony and immediately sat down on it, shielding itself from prying eyes with an open umbrella, which the wind continually tried to snatch it from her weak hands. What she did there is no need to clarify, only the whole process with a bucket and an umbrella spotted a cheerful guy from the upper balcony, who liked to shoot unusual moments in our sinful life ... He pinned a little note to the photo about "like the tenants of his house violate public order, and sent this report to the district executive committee. And then the commission arrived. The genial couple proved that there is no reason below life and they offered to pay a fine for an unauthorized apartment remodeling. After finishing the repair, the unsuccessful couple changed the apartment to a more comfortable one, but until then, they didn’t go down ...

January 29, 2019, Edward Zaitsev.