(Translation - FUCKTOR; author - Harddaysknight)

Part 1

This weekend was supposed to be just great. If I, of course, had an ideal wife! All I wanted was just a little fishing, drinking a beer, and relaxing. I have a good job, but too intense. I planned this little escape for a month, and Nan knew about it from the very beginning.

It all started on Friday evening, when I collected my belongings for a trip to the mountains. Nan entered the garage and dropped her little bomb.

“My mother called. She said that Aunt Maureen is not very good and we need to visit her if we want to see her even once. ”

I needed to be more sensitive. Now I understand that. I just blurted out. “I have no desire to see her, so this is not a problem. Besides, she has been standing with her foot in the grave ever since I met you, and stood long before that, according to your father. ”

I have not received a reply. Bad sign, I thought to myself. I looked at Nan. She had a look that is hard to describe, but all married men know what that means. It was a combination of anger and inevitability of punishment to demonstrate complete control over me. This is the view that makes men fall on their knees and beg for forgiveness, so as not to suffer for the next weeks or even months. This is the problem. It was obvious.

Why are men afraid of women who barely reach 100 pounds on the scales, and only two inches above five feet? I have my own theory, most men can subscribe to this. The feminine force comes from their little triangle between the legs. This is Kryptonite, which turns brave guys into cowardly, weak-willed weaklings. That is their strength. But women forget when hormones change the chemistry in their body, that Kryptonite loses its strength if it is not used. I'm not talking about every day, but a man needs a piece of meat at least a couple of times a month if a woman wants to maintain her strength.

If you don't get it, then the threat of weaning loses its effect, right? Women recognize their strength when they are young and like their bed. They use it to keep a man in check and control. Somewhere in 20 or so years, they start to forget about the source of their strength, and they think that only fear makes a man weak.

Most men prefer to enter the den to the bear, than to lose the location of his wife for a long time. When our relationship lasts a long time, we begin to understand that we do not receive this favor, no matter how much and often we jump through the hoop. Thus, the threat of weaning from these benefits becomes dubious. Men start thinking more about themselves. They are freed from the shackles!

They can fish, drink beer with friends, soak in dirty jokes, and just have fun. This is very disturbing for women. They begin to think why their influence has waned. Female control has become a habit for both spouses. Then the husband comes out of the fog and looks around. His head becomes clear and life calls him. In the absence of sex has its advantages, he understands. Truth frees him! He gets it and doesn't give it to anyone, so why the hell should he worship a creature that weighs half as much as his body weight? It was a revelation that I have enjoyed recently.

The point is not that I did not want sex, and did not enjoy it when I had it. I simply accepted the fact that I did not need him more than a couple of times a year. There were always reasons (excuses), but the result was unchanged. No sex Then she developed her theory. that if I got up, then I'm ready for sex. (Honestly, it was hard for me to argue with this logic). There is no need to caress, stroke or play with a member who has risen. He is ready, so why spend extra effort? Certainly suck this little boy was not an option.

On the other hand, she needed to be cherished, cooked for her, lick, play and give all sorts of expensive trinkets, just for the opportunity to be admitted to her little triangle. Then you climb the mountain, doing almost everything, after all the incredible efforts you can imagine, and it eludes and says one little thing that “spoils the mood.” You have not passed the test and will not get any pussy.

As a result, everything becomes much easier, and it is better to watch football or go fishing, so that you are less disappointed. The fact that you are not asking for sex is not noticed for the first few months. She is glad you do not disturb her. In the end, it comes to her that you are not making any efforts that she likes to break off so much. One of the greatest pleasures in her life eludes her! She begins to suspect that you have an affair on the side and begins to follow your every step. Of course, you're not such a fool to mess with another piece of Kryptonite!

You are free and calm. She is worried and alarmed. Funny how this balance is. She is experimenting with you, watching how much effort you are willing to spend to get to this little gap. But now you have a clear head, and you do not want to play these games. If she wants to fuck, she should raise your dick and let you climb on it. Forget about all romantic dinners and a one-way game!

“We are leaving tomorrow, and will visit Maureen. You can fish at any other time. This is more important, ”Nan finally said, which simply infuriated me.

“I had my own plans, and I will not break them. Maureen does not even remember who you are, let alone about me. I have been waiting for this fishing trip for a long time, and it is more important for me than a 90-year-old aunt who cannot recognize herself in the mirror, ”I said.

“You're such an egoist, self-satisfied bastard!” Nana shouted. “Go fishing! I don't care, you can never come back! ”

It completely suited me and there was nothing bad about it. I have heard this before and could survive it. But this time I made a mistake. I let Nan understand how free I am and how clear I am!

“Do not expect any sex now. I don't want you to touch me from now on, ”exclaimed Nan. It was too much.

I started laughing. It was not the most sincere laugh, but from the heart. "Horrible! After 20 years of daily sex, how will I survive? ”I asked. “The good old left hand always served me well. Now it's just me and you, my old girl! ”I grinned.

I raised my left hand and kissed her. Nan just looked at me, and I saw the understanding in her eyes. Her threat had no effect, because I already led the life of a monk. She turned around and stomped back into the house, and I finished my preparations.

Later that evening I was watching TV, alone, when the phone rang. I heard Nan answer the bell in the kitchen. She spoke very quietly, so I sneaked up to the door to overhear. The essence of the conversation was that Aunt Maureen felt much better, and there was no reason for panic. Everything else did not matter. Am I wrong?

When it was time to go to bed, the door to our bedroom was locked. Nan decided to punish me by blocking access to the bedroom. It didn’t bother me much, but I needed clothes and clothes for my morning departure. I knocked and tried to explain the situation through the door. Nan called out to me to go to hell and go to the guest room. I started to boil.

The sleep was not easy for me that night. I jumped at five and tried again to come into our bedroom. The door was still closed. I turned over all night and was in a terrible mood. Why can't I just pack my things and go fishing? The whole house will be at her disposal, and she will get rid of me until the resurrection.

I retreated a couple of steps and ran to the door. The jamb cracked, and the door swung open. Nan woke up immediately and jumped up. She started to say something, but my expression made her falter ....