beard made of cotton!

Did you bring us gifts?

Fuck you hairy! ”

Prologue.

As time went. It was the second mid-December. Soon the New Year and literally everyone was preoccupied with his meeting. And then there's the session on the nose. In short, everyone did not go, but flew, returning debts at the institute, getting credits, and preparing for the holiday.

It is no secret that the New Year is the most beloved holiday in the country. It is not bound by any dogma, and according to a good Russian tradition it can be celebrated several times! Although he has different names. Here is an exemplary list of the New Year holiday: from December 25, for those who are especially concerned, we celebrate the bourgeois Christmas; from December 31 to January 1 New Year; then smoothly from January 1 to January 13, World Faceted Glass Day; Well, the apotheosis is Old New Year! And after that, everyone is trying to concentrate on working on the rails, being treated with brine and beer.

Well, we students are no exception in this big "holiday marathon". Of course, it's harder for us. When everyone is resting, many of us take exams in between the festivities. Well, this is not an obstacle and we unanimously support the folk tradition.

What is New Year's holiday? For those who do not know this is a tricky thing. It comes at 12 am from December 31 to January 1:

• Preparation of some dishes for a feast, without which no New Year passes, begins in the morning of December 30;

These are: winter salad, jelly and, of course, baguette sandwiches with butter, red caviar and fresh vegetables;

• The first phase of the holiday, according to “absentee ballots” from home, takes place at lunch time at the workplace, usually they drink champagne with vodka;

• From 7 to 10 pm there is a collection of companies according to interests and preferences somewhere in the venue of the event;

• After 10, they sit down at the table and start eating and pouring alcoholic beverages. (Particularly unfortunate meet the New Year under the table or in a salad!);

• After the chiming clock at 12 o'clock at night, people air out their heads from hops. And they are engaged in popular Russian entertainment: they ride from the ice slides, drink champagne and vodka on the street, take pictures and wait for the New Year in the capital of our country, Moscow, if they live not in the same time zone.

• And then someone likes what: watching TV, beating each other's face, fucking well, and still doing all sorts of interesting things hours until 6-7 am ...

• Everything usually ends in sleep. From that hour, 4–5 am to 3 days and beyond, the “treatment of hangover syndrome” begins with abundant libations of alcohol passing into an ordinary drunk ...

— 1-.

I was broken and I reluctantly agreed to hold a festive event in my apartment. I had to become a hospitable host of the holiday and maybe survive the “fall of the Roman Empire” and, at the same time, the “Colosseum” who are “in my house”. Students are a disorderly people, but if we add to this the abundant libations of “firewater”, then they can be safely attributed to the category of “barbarians” who defeated Rome! But "he called himself a cargo, get into a box" ...

Distributed business concerns, and began training. The necessary ingredients for the celebration were brought to my house. This is a box of champagne, a couple of boxes of vodka, an unlimited amount of canned beer and so on, and so on, and so on ... Tatiana volunteered to cook aspic and vegetables for salads. They decided to cut them in the evening before the new year.

She came to my house on the 30th in the morning. Meat and lytki on jelly were, on her instructions for the night, covered with water and so left for ... And hell knows what for! She brought a helper with her. She was Red. The girls, dressed, started cooking. I, as a person who does not possess the necessary knowledge, but the necessary “to bring and serve,” acted at their disposal.In short, we spun in the kitchen from morning until late evening until the last tray was poured and brought to the balcony to cool. Later, the final operation was to end up cooling the mass in the refrigerator. Yet it is not the month of May outside and the temperature is about minus 20 degrees!

When all the trays were put up on the balcony, Redhead began to gather home. And no persuasion did not stop her though, I must admit, Tanya, and I didn’t try very hard either. Presumably, she still had ambitious plans for that night, but what about me? (Good position. And you do not stand out and get everything in the complex ...). I like a true gentleman dressed and walked her to the road. Where despite the protests, caught a taxi, gave her money and sent her home. The time was later, and getting home in a different way, and even with a rising frost, was problematic.

Returned home in half an hour. Tanya has already finished cleaning and got into the bath to wash. Not listening to my unconvincing protests and excuses about fatigue, she later dragged me into bed, and my parents and we started playing love games that were not very active, but long enough ... Then, having washed, they filled the refrigerator with trays and then calmed down. True, Tatiana "demanded the continuation of the banquet," but both of us were so tired, and the arguments were so ridiculous that I ignored the continuation of "physical education" in favor of healthy sleep.

We slept until eleven, and when we got up, what I was afraid of and what had already happened here began. Tatiana felt like a “hostess” and began to command “breaking” my established habits and actions. Laughing, I made a joking remark to her and, throwing on my old coat, went out to the balcony to smoke with a cup of the strongest coffee. When he returned, everything in the apartment changed. If before that there were “breeze gusts”, now the storm has broken out. I tried again to talk with Tanya, but she just pounded the dishes in the kitchen louder. When I got tired of it, I warned it plainly:

- Tanya. You take it too cool. You're not the hostess here and you shouldn't spoil my mood in the morning!

In general, as happens in such situations: “Word for word and“ member ”on the table ...“! With tears, she gathered and jumped out of the apartment, calling me in every way. The most decent was the type: an ungrateful bastard and an egoist ... He laughed at her attempts and, it seems, in vain. Actually, she was a good girl, just stubborn. Postponing the truce to the evening, he took up the final preparation for the holiday, and uncorked a can of beer from the refrigerator for training.

— 2-.

After breakfast, I decided to rest, lay down and fell asleep. Long before the arrival of the main forces, due to put in order the remnants of the apartment and start preparing additional dishes and salads, as well as laying the table. Tanya called several times, but her phone was disconnected and I quit this occupation, deciding: it will grind, the flour will be ... or; and where she is cute from the submarine go!

Gone! At about eight o'clock in the evening Redhead came and reported:

- I saw Tanya. She said she would be celebrating New Year's Eve with friends. Have you quarreled?

- Well, there is a little ... We'll have to, apparently, follow her into the hostel!

- So, there is her there! She sat in a taxi with me and drove off somewhere, ”said Olga, going to the kitchen to help the girls.

Exhausted from the lack of information and even some jealousy, I could not concentrate on anything. Tried to help the girls, but was expelled from the kitchen for stupidity. The head was busy not so. Then the guys started coming up, and I organized a circle: “How do you like the stoparik before the holiday!” ... Well, they came with the ladies and didn’t really support me, they pretended more. And already before we sat down at the table, I piled up. No, I have not fallen yet, but I was on the verge of it. Not to say that spoiled the holiday, but clearly did not serve as its decoration. And after I drank champagne to the sound of the bells, I just turned off. And the head was disconnected, and the body continued to behave not very well.

Probably, the old song of V. S. Vysotsky is about this and is written:

And the next morning I woke up -

let me report

what, the hostess scolded ...

wanted to make everyone ...

What, they say, the songs were screaming ...

* * *

Lil on the walls of wine, ...