Going to Nowhere from Nowhere ...

Instead of versts - expired days ...

I'm tired of the blue fornication,

and the soul longs for love.

My horses were tired - they became.

Ahead is a blazing sunset.

I looked around - my path sweeps

red clown - yellow leaves ...

Behind shoulders - cities and years ...

Meetings ... Parting ... Names ...

Persons ... Crossroads ... Turns ...

Behind shoulders - the first spring ...

... southern provincial town ...

May rain, rustling outside the window ...

my school friend

blond guy ...

anus, blazing fire ...

blood on the fingers ... the smell of vaseline ...

gentle voice: "My girl ..."

I smile calmly

saying nothing in response ...

girl? ... what nonsense, god! ..

we kiss passionately ... and he

exposes its hymen too, -

I catch his lips moan ...

hands hugging passionately ...

lips burning again ...

low whisper:

"Who are we? Buggers? ”

the first is crazy! - love ...

May rain

drumming on the leaves ... -

"My life!

Or did you dream of me?

Like I'm spring echoing

Rode on a pink horse ... "-

vague - distant! - languor ...

wet predawn dreams ...

hot - with a hand! - couples ...

the tumult of suddenly surging spring -

First experience...

cities and years ...

heart dear names ...

sticky smirks of homophobes ... -

behind the shoulders - time and country ...

And ... at the turn of the millennium,

remembering the very first time

I am another, already forty years old,

all tasted as Ecclesiastes, -

I'm not crying about anything, nor regretting ...

And I do not need another fate!

Catch my breath. Distemper overcome.

And again - the whole world is in front of me!

Who said I'm from nowhere?

Who decided that I was going to Nowhere?

Life is love: loved, loved and will

continue to love! - not the worst fate!

27. X. 1999