When I close my eyes, I plunge into a dark forest where each branch causes pain to grow into you and you do not know a way out of this darkness. Suffering from unbearable pain, aversion to helplessness. What to do in this situation? And if we all knew for sure, then probably there would not be so much talk, songs, and love poems.
You wake up and see this pretty, tender, sleepy face that smiles at you a little, or maybe it just seems that way. You look around its outline, look at the fun lying on the pillows of hair and suddenly you begin to feel anxious, a terrible excitement that overtook you even once. Gently running your hand over your head, you gently and terribly slowly kiss her and slowly rush her again. You get up and run out into the street for a walk. After a long run along the coast, you run home. You open the door so quietly and carefully so as not to wake her up and see the fascinating circuit standing on the port window. She stands in one beacon and shorts and looks out the window. There is a noisy surf and the beautiful sun shines right in your eyes. It is thoughtful and motionless. You approach it slowly and silently. Coming up hugging her waist and kissing her neck. And suddenly you feel her hands on yourself. She smiles and laughs a little. You whisper in her ear, “Good morning, honey,” and she will smile back and make a serious face again. Today is Sunday - the day when it is necessary to relax and think about the elapsed time, let it be a week, a month or a year. There is no dispute who will cook breakfast. At the table, both are silent and only smile on their faces. Perhaps it is just such a morning that I want to rest. There is no desire to fuss about something to say ... After all, they understand everything without words.
On this day, they decided to go to an amusement park. She immediately said, “I'm driving the car sweet.” And you will not argue with her, because you do not have the strength to do so. No, if only because you just see her smile. And she understands this and treats reciprocate.
Riding on a roller coaster, she spreads into screams and smiles cheerfully, and you look at her and also smile. You smile because you see how happy she is and at this moment you get a bit of her happiness. She is beautiful, her developing hair is terribly beautiful. You can admire her forever. Afterwards, she asks you with a smile and a laugh - “Favorite, did you like it?” with all my might and say “God, how I love you dear!”.
Then they went for a walk in the park. He walked and thought about everything! He planned, he counted, he wondered ...
She said to him - "Let's sit down here, talk ..." He was not surprised. And she told him everything. The fact that everything is finished, that it can no longer continue. She told him that there was no more love from her, that there were no feelings, that they were so long ago that only the habit remained and not love. Knowing how he loves her, her tears flowed ... and said - "Forgive me, please, please forgive me." He continued to sit still, feeling that this was not a joke or a joke. She left, kissed him on the cheek, as if showing that they were no longer so close.
He sat and thought ...
The man whom he loved so much ... And he asked, what is love? And he answered himself ...
Love is ... when you feel one with your loved one, when you worry about his every act, when he feels bad and at the same time is even worse for you, when you look at him and realize that losing his meaning in life is you are ready to give his life without hesitation, when you like everything, in him, good and bad, when you wake up and feel his heartbeat, when you try to make his next day better than the previous ...
He loved her more than his mother, he gave himself to her, not sparing a single drop, leaving nothing for himself. Tried to make her every birthday the best. Tried to protect her from all living things. It is probably impossible to endure such love ... probably it is terrible, but what can be done when you love so much? What? If already loved. He sat and did not know where to go next. His home is where she is. His life is life in which she is ... He could not imagine that she was with another, he did not believe that this could be ...
There was no more love in his life. Since then he has not lived, but existed.
Every time when he came to this park and sat on this bench, he closed his eyes, plunged into a dark forest where every branch caused pain to grow into his body and he did not know a way out of this darkness. He suffered from intolerable pain, and aversion to helplessness. Tears of regret flowed from his eyes.