I do not excite the uttering of sums with one or another number of zeros. I am not nouveau riche, and I am proud of that. My parents made my money. But getting into the MIG-21 was worth not only money, but also a lot of effort. Even those people about whom I was reliably aware that they are members of the club, frankly laughed at me and said that the club MIG-21 is a myth like flying saucers. The club closed a week after I was received, and I spent only one evening in it. But I do not regret the effort spent. I turned out to be one of the few dedicated to the history of the club, and it seems that I am one of three who know the reason for its elimination. I will talk about my only night at the club. I'll omit the details and start from the most interesting: from how I ended up in a long dim corridor ...

1. A royal romance.

You feel lost when you wander along a long unfamiliar half-dark corridor, being, moreover, completely naked. Probably, this can claim to be a metaphor of human existence: I do not deny, I was recommended to look into the room of a room such and such, but the number immediately disappeared from my memory. Do not write it was his ballpoint pen on the palm! In addition, they explained to me that I was free to knock on any door if it was not locked without knocking. (And how, I wonder, could I enter the locked door? Using the penis instead of the master key?) I was pushed into a pair of doors, but they just turned out to be locked. So I wandered in indecision and twilight, experiencing a feeling of being lost, close to existential.

At the end of the corridor, a naked girl flashed, which in my metaphysical frame of mind I could easily have mistaken for an angel from heaven. She fluttered into one of the doors, and I, enthusiastic, followed her.

In the room, in addition to the girl, I found by no means an angelic look of a hefty brunette, naked, like me, but thickly covered with hair from feet to chin.

- I did not interfere? - I asked timidly from the doorway.

- Why did you interrupt, dear? - answered the brunette. - You're new, huh? We are all here at home, yes? My name is Akif. Do not waste time, right?

He knocked the girl back and entangled her hands with a rope. Then he jerked up and hung to a hook hanging from the ceiling. He did it like shepherds with small animals like sheep. Then he began to beat the girl on the back with a whip. He hit hard, because the blood appeared almost immediately. The girl screamed. He beat not only hard, but also for a long time, and she did not close her mouth for a second.

All this quickly exhausted me, and after some time I could not stand it. I grabbed Akif by the hairy arm and said pathetically: “Well, that's enough. I'm sick of you. Buy a pig in the bazaar and chop it alive if you are high. And leave the girl alone. ” He turned to me sharply, naked, hairy, with an erect penis, and looked straight into his eyes. At the same moment I regretted my outbreak. Sorry, perhaps, meeting the eyes of the killer. He was not angry. He calmly assessed how to most effectively stop my biological functioning.

If something is good for me, it is to writh such a physiognomy as if I myself am the great Bruce Lee, or at least the favorite student of the latter. This kept Akif from immediate reprisals. I continued to gaze at him with a superman look, but I was overwhelmed with bad feelings.

It is not known how our silent stage would have ended, but the door opened wide and a stocky, bald man of about sixty appeared on the threshold. At the reception ceremony, I was introduced to him as the club chairman. The towel around his hips suggested that he was going to shower. Behind him, with an easy, quick step, a beautiful woman came in, about fifteen years younger, in a very expensive strict dress. Her name, I remember, Anna.She performed here as something of a hostess of the evening and, as far as I could notice, all the guests showed extreme respect for her.

- I did not prevent you from having fun, gentlemen? - pointedly politely asked the chairman. - Are you satisfied with the service? girls? drinks? Do you have any special wishes? By the way, let me remind you just in case that the club charter not only does not welcome, but also directly prohibits quarrels and the clarification of relations between its members. Violators can be immediately expelled by just my decision and without refund of the entrance fee.

After the mention of the entry fee, my Akif and I love my mutual destruction had somewhat cooled, but it did not finally die out.

“Akif,” the chairman continued, “you are an old member of our club.” You have no idea how much we appreciate your participation. I beg you to excuse this young man. He is a newcomer who also confused the room number. His, so to speak, overwhelmed by impressions. I also apologize for the spoiled pleasure. We will take all measures to compensate for your losses.

He made a sign to Anne. She knelt before Akif and kissed the hairy toes of his legs. Then she ran the tip of his tongue over his hairy legs and licked his hairy scrotum. Akif's face expressed beastly bliss, and he dropped a whip from his hands. Anna immediately picked it up and offered it to be taken back with a respectful gesture.

“I swear, Anna,” said Akif, swallowing saliva, “your attention is a great honor for me.” I don’t need a whip with you.

“Don't say that,” Anna sang gently, still kneeling. “On the contrary, it is a great honor for me to serve you.” You will make me unhappy if you do not allow me to deliver all those pleasures to which you are accustomed and who have the right to deliver other women.

And she drew Akif from the room. Watching them out, the chairman grinned nervously.

“Well, and you, young man,” he said reproachfully to me. - You come to our club, make a favorable impression on everyone, fascinate Anna, provide excellent recommendations, and suddenly, in half an hour, make an ugly scandal. How would you understand?

I stood looking down. Then he tried to explain:

- Please excuse me, Mr. Chairman. I understand that I look absurd brawler. But I came here for exquisite pleasures, and not for cutting meat.

And I pointed to the girl who caused the quarrel with Akif. For some reason, Akif did not touch her buttocks (which, from my point of view, were the most interesting target), but her back made a strong impression. As it turned out, not on the chairman.

- Ehe-he, - he sighed, - youth-youth. You have not yet understood that all the troubles in the world are from women. From stupid and stupid women. Such as this. Hey you, how are you there?

“Tanya,” the girl mumbled.

- You mediocrity, Tanya! It would be better if I sold you for organ transplantation than I allowed you to respect the public.

“The girl is not to blame,” I said. “This butcher, without presenting an ultimatum, hung it and went to whip him with a whip.

“Well, let me disagree with you, young man,” objected the chairman. - I did not get a good education in my youth, but in some ways my experience far exceeds yours. And believe me, an intelligent woman will always find how to soften and appease a man. A gesture, a look, even a scream.

He walked over to Tatiana and slapped a palm over his bloody back. She screamed good mat.

“Well, what kind of cry is that?” The chairman grimaced. - If you want to appease the gentleman, the cry must express, of course, fear and pain. But also a prayer, and unconditional deference, and unlimited devotion. And she yells like a pig in a slaughterhouse. Consider that Akif is a Muslim, and for Muslims a pig is an unclean animal. Will Akif fuck an unclean animal? ...