Last time it was followed by a constant, steady sexual arousal. And now: he did not sit at the hotel (the masturbation helped a little) and pushed into an erotic cafe, but it turned out to be still closed. No luck and only! It remained to perekantovatsya somewhere and he decided to look into the Riga Sex History Museum, especially since he had not been here for more than ten years of absence, and also because, just in case, he had a fresh number of “Urinist” migrant with him New detective local author.

At first he was even interested in exposure. He slowly walked along the walls and in front of him the panorama of an erotic story opened, beginning with the Iron Age (crown), then the remnants of the charred wooden bed, which he first took over the skeleton of the Viking rook, stone gravestones of the earthen creek, and the first stone walls of the earthen crags amusements like old-fashioned dogs, various belts of modesty, excerpts from the prostitution laws and statutes of the houses of tolerance, all collected and kept with the greatest care, because Riga by its glory of the erotic mecca of Eastern Europe.

He idly got acquainted with the extract from Sebastian Münster (1569): “This city is as great as Freiburg ... The beautiful square on the coast of Daugava is not inferior to the Gamburg. Livonians use women in safe and non-Christian postures. There are many professional women of love here ... In the summer, they arrange entire presentations on the boats in the middle of the river. ”

Yes, a cheerful burgher town, a protesters' camp, merchants, priests, warriors. He went down to the second floor, where our age began. The hall was large, long, white and pink. In one order, they were packed with original glass cabinets filled with magnificent color photographs of nude girls and yellow erotic publications; in some places he noticed and enjoyed exploring with the help of magnifying glasses exact replicas of the genitalia of the most famous Riga heterosexuals. It was cool and quiet, he soon felt that he was unbearably excited. This was noticed by the museum attendant.

- - Here please! - she kindly attracted him to some narrow, but very cozy room. - Here you can relax.

Indeed, here he was met by a young, but already extremely experienced creation, a half hourly erotic massage for all the rules of art that was completely free of charge.

“We have everything here provided for the convenience of the visitor,” she announced with pride when he came to himself, and in fact felt somewhat lighter. - But nevertheless, sir, I would not advise you to especially be held up by the dummy of the genitals - you are extremely excitable!

Indeed, it was worth a little move the spirit. In the next room, he spotted several comfortable sofas and decided to arrange one of them with his magazine. I remember that the detective was called “The Longest Strike” and it was there that some unknown subject serenely sat down on the most honorable toilet in a cafe for regulars, and even at the wrong hour, and anxiously waited for him to bring coffee, what is so terribly annoying to the waiter, who, just at that time, as a rule, he himself accomplishes the sacred act of “masturbation urination”: “Harald has smoked a cigarette. Only in the course of this sexual act does he allow himself to smoke in the institution. He ignites aromatic candles and polishes the toilet to a mirror-like shine. Then follows a series of almost ritual gestures, alternating in strict order: he lowers his speeches, for some time as if his own member irresponsibly considers him and starts slowly putting him into working state. ”

It is fascinating to read, because the authors at the very beginning made it clear that the stranger on the honorary toilet would be dragged into the scuffle and killed.And then you read it and you wait tensely, what will be the end of his warm sitting, and along the way, the authors describe the regulars, their sexual habits, their way of life and it feels like they all know it well.

There is no collective time, and the client is still sitting. “More and more regulars are coming in, Honald knows in advance who needs what stimulants, devices and drugs. Exactly one o'clock. At the cafe a car slowed down, from which the Colonel left ... "

Something began to bother him imperceptibly: whether the measured life of the regulars of a street institution, or something else. He involuntarily raised his head and found the interested view of the next museum attendant. Perhaps she deserves a few words.

If almost all the halls were full of colors for every taste in unusually frank robes, then in this room for some reason a thick-haired, fair-haired, with a heavy horse face was standing in a worn blue dressing gown. And now it looked at him and his color journal with greedy curiosity. He followed her gaze and suddenly realized that it was she, the minister, who was depicted on the cover, only without a dressing gown, in a shamelessly dispersed pose: the massive thighs were wide open, the head was thrown, the balls of the bodies stand in a twisted way, she arched, her head was wrung out, I was knocked out by the same time. Directly in the face of the reader a tight frothy stress of the spiritual earth! The inscription under the picture read: "Jadwiga, champion of upinists."

Meanwhile, Jadwiga had already approached him and started the conversation carefully:

- I see, mister is interested in the topic?

“I ... actually ...,” he scrolled, mixing up, because in general he was a fan of ordinary sex and was interested in such deviations only out of pure curiosity.

- I understand, I understand! - picked up the girl, winking conspiratorially. - It's not so easy to decide. But you are lucky! Follow me!

She led him into an office furnished with utterly unusual: in fact, it was rather a large bathroom, richly equipped with various arrangements for sophisticated urination, as well as baths and other things unknown to him.

Emerging paramedics quickly divided it and placed in a bath of a special form. Right above his face was a transparent seat with holes like a shower. He wanted to escape, to test, but the noise flowing into the bath of fragrant water drowned out his exclamations. Besides, he was curious.

Immediately above him, on the seat, someone's juicy ass was set up, he could look at the anus, tight sex lips in all its details. He was excited. And during this time, his face flowed on his face. There was no way to dodge - the bath device did not allow this. He resigned to his fate, deciding to rebuild, but the “golden rain” poured and flowed, dousing his face with warm drops. It seemed that heaven's abyss had opened above it. In amazement, he opened his eyes: above him already sat quite a different female ass! Before he said that it was happening, he was replaced by the next, then another one ...

After half an hour he was carefully removed from the bath, carefully washed, wiped out, wrapped in fluffy sheets. It seems that they were convinced that he had given a gift of speech from the sudden happiness that had fallen on him. Their faces shone with kindness, he was called not only “brother”. He did not have the courage to spoil them. With difficulty he escaped from their hospitable paws, rushed out of the room ... Through two halls, he discovered that two girls from this crazy company were following him. He quickened his steps, began to sweep around - are there other, more serious trials waiting for him?

- Your magazine, sir! - in unison, the girls agreed. “Jadwiga left her autograph on it for you.”

He studied the words of gratitude, squeezed the idiotic journalist under his arm and jumped out into the street. The area was full of people. He trudged into an erotic cafe - rather, by inertia, than by following needs. A neighbor on the table, at first, long and irresponsibly sniffing at something, then suddenly turned around clearly and, leaning on the magazine, moved around at the other table. Her place was immediately taken by a lively young man:

- Nice to meet brother! - He began gravely. Suddenly, he noticed Jadwigi's extensive list. His face became seemingly submissive:

- Did the brother get the golden rain of the champion herself? Does the brother belong to the circle of the elect? I dare not disturb ..., - the guy bowed with immeasurable respect and disappeared.

“Well, it's a day,” he thought, hurriedly leaving the cafe, so as not to get stuck in some other dull story. - “They fought, pissed, endowed with an autograph, through it became almost a celebrity ... And this insane museum, which they lost in the very center of the city?” This is really an erotic Mecca! Perhaps, from the language here it is necessary to be more careful. "